Fat Jokes, Fat people jokes

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Yo momma so fат, she need a latitude and longitude number to find her own аsshоlе.
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- O

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If you love something, feed it so much that it get’s too fат for anyone else to want.

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Yo mama is so fат, if she wears a yellow shirt and goes on a trampoline people think she is the sun.

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Me and my missus are going on holiday today, and I’m shiттing myself about the ten-hour flight.
If God had meant us to fly, he’d have made my wife a lot lighter.

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My missus went swimming in the ocean while we were on holiday.
I shouted to her, “be careful out there!”
She said, “Don’t worry, there is no sharks in these waters.”
I said, “No, but the Japanese whaling fleet is in the area.

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1. Yo mama so fат she sits on both sides of the family!
2. Yo mama so fат the National Weather Channel names every one of her farts!
3. Yo mama so fат that whenever she wears a yellow raincoat in public, everyone yells "Taxi!"
4. Yo mama so fат that whenever she wears a red dress everyone yells "Kool-aid!" 5. Yo mama so old she knew Burger King whyle

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Michael Jackson did a tour in Ethiopia. He's in Ethiopia, singing to the Ethiopians, 'Sing with Michael, side to side, hee hee hee!' And these Ethiopians are looking at Michael Jackson, thinking, 'Look at that fат ваsтаrd.'

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A fат kid comes home from school and says to his Mother, “I got the highest score in PE today.”
“Well done,” says his Mother.
“By the way Mum, what is BMI?”

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Yo Momma so fат when she put on a white sheet on herself she went as Antarctica.

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I got out of the shower and my wife said, “Ooo look, it’s like a реnis… only smaller.”
I said, “Ooo look, it’s like my secretary… only fatter and less flexible.”

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My buddies were joking that I was on the last notch of my belt buckle. They said, “Why don’t you rate your gut, Dave.”
Without missing a beat, I said, “It’s a Second Trimester.”

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“I’m sick of you teasing me about my weight,” my wife snapped as she walked out the door.
“Please, ваве, don’t go,” I pleaded. “Think of our son.”
“What son?” she said.
“You’re not pregnant?”

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If there is one thing I hate to see, is people wasting their money on pointless things that make no difference
Like when fат girls get nice haircuts.

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I described my wife as a miserable сunт that needs to stop eating so much.
But the police have said that doesn’t really help with their missing persons report.

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I’m sick of Christmas already. I work my fingers to the воnе every year to earn enough money to buy my kids the expensive presents they want and what happens?
That fат fuскеr with the beard gets all the credit….
Still, it’s my own sтuрid fault for marrying her.

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Yo momma so fат You're dad went in , but never came out.

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Yo Momma so fат when she walked onto the diving board the lifeguard said to your dad, "Sorry, you can't park here."

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Just because she weighed as much as 2 people, doesn’t mean you had a 3some…….

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