Fat people jokes

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My girlfriend wanted to try “doctor and patient” roleplay. …
But things went awry from the start when I said:
“Hello! I’m your dietitian.”

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A girl asks her doctor, “how many calories are there in сuм?” the doctor replies, “Don’t worry, if you swallow, nobody will care if you are fат.”

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I’m not saying my wife’s fат.
It’s just that planes shouldn’t do wheelies.

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Met two fат girls with accents in the pub last night. Very interested, I approached and asked “Are you 2 girls from Birmingham?”
She said “Get it right, Wales love”. I replied “Oh I’m sorry, are you 2 whales from Birmingham?”

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When I was in my 20’s and 30’s I used a fluorescent light to grow рот. Alas, years later, I’m growing a рот belly.

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When some one told you that you have jelly rolls, you tried to eat yourself but your fат body stopped you from doing so.

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My girlfriend was telling me that black men’s соскs taste like cabbage.
Then I thought- how would she know that?
The fат вiтсh has never eaten cabbage in her life.

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Yo momma so fат shes never heard of hide and seek.

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I was on a date with layla, a blonde girl from Essex, looking at the menu she points and says,
"Oh i like the idea of this choice but it says fат free.. I dont want any free fат!"

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I’ve just seen a programme called, ‘I didn’t know I was pregnant.’
AKA I’m a fат вiтсh.

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Yo mama so fат,when she tried to commit suicide by jumping from a building,all the people shouted"NO!DONT DO IT! HAVE MERCY ON THE GROUND

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I was relaxing on the beach today when a fат bird came over and said, “Would you rub this lotion into my back please?”
“I’m afraid I’m only here for the day,” I replied.

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I thought I'd like this thing because I like meat. Three days into it, I had eaten so much meat, I was perusing the neighborhood at four in the morning looking for cats and stuff. My heart was beating a million miles a minute. I've got bacon fат dripping off my eyelashes. People are like, 'Hey, you look pretty good. Did you lose some weight?'
'Get over here. I'll eat your face right off your head.'

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Yo mama is so fат whenever she wears a yellow rain coat everyone calls out TAXI

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Yo mama so fат when she sat on a dollar bill George wasinhgton said o hail can you see,get your fат аss off me!

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I've seen this at the Big N' Tall store, a pair of pants in a size 50w/30l. Friend, when your pant size is also a motor oil viscosity, I think there's a need for redirection in your diet program.

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I hate it when fат people call me skinny.
I mean, b*tch , your the extra terrestrial

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So a pickle and cucumber where talking. the cucumber said to the pickle when ever i get big fат and juice i get sliced up and put on a salad, the pickle said when i get big fат and juice i get sliced up and put in a jar. a реnis over heard the conversation and said that's nothing, when i get big fат and juice my owner put a bag over my head and sticks me in a dark smelly room and makes me do push-ups until i throw up.

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