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A ham sandwich walked into a bar and the bartender said:
"We don't sell to ham sandwiches."
But the sandwich replied:
"That's okay, I only want a вееr."
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Where is the best place to hide a niggеr's food stamps?
Under his work boots.
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Two old ladies are in a restaurant.
One complains, "You know, the food here is just terrible."
The other shakes her head and adds, "And such small portions."
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библиотека им. ленина. в читальном зале сидят доктора наук
Блондинка влиза в библиотека
A blonde went in the library and walked up to the librarian behind the desk and said
Μπαίνει μια ξανθιά στη βιβλιοθήκη και αρχίζει να φωνάζει: - "Μια πίτα γύρο από όλα χωρίς μουστάρδα." Ο βιβλιοθηκάριος της λέει διακριτικά: - "Συγνώμη κυρία μου
A blonde enters a library. She goes to the counter and says "I'll like a cheeseburger
Une blonde rentre dans une blibliothéque et elle dit : - "un coca
Sarışının biri kütüphaneye gitmiş ve direk bankoya yönelerek görevliden bir hamburger
En blondin gick till ett bibliotek och sa - Hej
Un fou entre dans une bibliothèque : "-Bonjour
En blondin klev in i ett bibliotek och gick fram till bibliotikarien och sa: - En hamburgare med pommes tack! - Men lilla vännen
Geht eine Blondine in die Bibliothek und fragt: "Kann ich ein Döner haben?" Sagt der Bibliothekar: "Das hier ist eine Bibliothek." Flüstert die Blondine "Kann ich einen Döner haben."
Een dom blondje komt de bibliotheek binnen en roept: “Een zak friet en een frikandel!” Sssssst u bent hier in een bibliotheek
Une blonde entre dans une bibliothèque
C’est une blonde qui rentre dans une bibliothèque et qui demande à l’accueil : - Bonjour
A blonde walks into a library and asks the librarian, "Can I have a burger and fries?"
She replies, "Sorry, this is a library."
The blonde whispers, "Oh, sorry. May I have a burger and fries?"
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Cowboy Talks to the Animals
Der Moslemflüsterer
Един срещнал на полето овчар с куче
Мужик приходит к председателю колхоза и говорит:
Un ventriloquo arriva in un paese e vede un contadino seduto con un cane
Ein Christ trifft einen Türken mit einem Hund
Un indien est en train de garder des chèvres. Un cow-boy se pointe et lui dit : - C'est ton chien ? - Lui être ! - Je peux lui parler un peu ? - Chien pas parler ! Bon
Een cowboy komt een dorpje binnen en ziet een indiaan aan de rand van zijn huis zitten. Cowboy: "Leuke hond heb je. Vind je het erg als ik met hem praat?" Indiaan: "Hond niet praten." Cowboy:...
Een buiksprekende
A traveling salesman goes to a farm house. The farmer goes
En bugtalende cowboy En bugtalende cowboy kommer ridende inde fra byen
Un paysan voit que ses bêtes ne sont pas dans leur assiette et décide de faire venir le vétérinaire : - Alors ? Quel est le problème ? - Je ne sais pas trop justement. - ? Il suffit de leur...
Un touriste se promène à la campagne et visite une ferme. Il demande au paysan de lui faire visiter. Ensemble
Un contadino è seduto sopra un pezzo di legno e arriva un signore vestito bene che gli chiede se può parlare con i suoi animali e il contadino gli dice di si anche se lui dice che non gli possono...
Englishman: "That your Dog"..?? Welshman: "Aye". Englishman: "Mind if I Speak to him"..?? Welshman: "Dog don't Talk.” Englishman: Hey Dog
While riding one day, a cowboy met an Indian riding along with a dog and a sheep and he began a conversation.
Cowboy: "Hey, nice dog you got there. Mind if I speak to him?"
Indian: "Dog no talk."
Cowboy: "Hey dog, how's it going?"
Dog: "Doin' alright."
Indian:( Look of shock )
Cowboy:"Is this Indian your owner?" ( Pointing at the Indian )
Dog: "Yep."
Cowboy: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Indian:( Look of disbelief )
Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Indian: "Horse no talk."
Cowboy: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Good."
Indian:( Extreme look of shock )
Cowboy: "Is this your owner?" ( Pointing at the Indian )
Horse: "Yep."
Cowboy: "How does he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often, and keeps me in a shed to protect me."
Indian:( Complete look of utter amazement )
Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Indian: "Sheep liar."
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Your Halloween costume came in the mail today. I opened it. It was a rooster mask and a bag of lollipops. Going as a c*ck sucker again!?
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Why would the cannibal only eat babies?
He was on a diet!
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What side of the соw gives the most milk?
The utter side.
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A plowhorse, a honeybee and an old geezer are debating about which of them is the greatest.
The horse says,
"I can plow all day long to provide food for dozens of people!"
" The bee says,
"I pollinate all the plants every year and make honey besides!"
The old geezer says...
(We're waiting...)
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For breakfast Chuck Norris enjoys toast and jellyfish.
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Q. Why don't blondes eat Jello?
A. They can't figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packages.
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What does the F in Ethiopia stand for?
Food
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A ham sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve food here."
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If Chuck Norris ever opened a restaurant, the only thing on the menu would be knuckle sandwiches and eye of roundhouse steaks.
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If I had a dollar every time a customer complained about the price of cinema food.
I could almost afford a small popcorn.
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The Dove Bar's like an 80-pound wаd of chocolate on a toothpick.
If you're not careful when you take it out of the package, you'll snap your wrists.
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Johnny collected lots of money from trick or treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate. ' You should give that money to charity,' said the shopkeeper.
'No, I'll buy the chocolate. You give the money to charity!'
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An Asian walks into a McDonald's and says, "I'll Have An Eggroll and Some Fry Rye."
"I'm sorry sir we don't serve that. Would you like anything else?"
"I have quarter pounder. And when would you like to pick that up...Hiroshima!"
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