Marriage Jokes, Family Jokes
One day, a teenage boy was absolutely over the moon that he had just passed his driving test. Then, just as his father was expecting, the boy approached his dad asking when they’d be able to have a discussion about him using the family car.
His father said he’d make a deal with his son:
“You need to bring your grades up from a C to a B, study the Bible, and get a haircut. Then we’ll talk about the car.’
The boy thought about it for a moment, decided he’d settle for the offer, and they came to an agreement.
After about six weeks, his father said:
“Son, you’ve brought your grades up and I’ve observed that you have been studying the Bible, but I’m disappointed you haven’t cut your hair yet.”
The boy said:
“You know, Dad, I’ve been thinking about that, and I’ve noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Моsеs had long hair - and there’s even strong evidence that Jesus had long hair!”
The dad nodded wisely, then leaned over and whispered to his son:
“Did you also notice they walked everywhere?”
All of his life George from Cape Breton had heard stories of an amazing family tradition. It seems that his father, grandfather and great-grandfather had all been able to walk on water on their 21st birthday. On that day, they'd walk across the lake to the boat club for their first legal drink.
So when George's 21st birthday came around, he and his pal Corky took a boat out to the middle of the lake. George stepped out of the boat and nearly drowned! Corky just managed to pull him to safety.
Furious and confused, George went to see his grandmother. "Grandma, it's my 21st birthday, so why can't I walk across the lake like my father, his father, and his father before him?"
Granny looked into George's eyes and said,
"Because your father, grandfather and great grandfather were born in January, you were born in July."