Cocktail lounge, Norway:
"Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar."
On an Athi River highway:
"Take notice: when this sign is under water, this road is impassable."
In a City restaurant:
"Open seven days a week and weekends.
Hotel, Japan:
"You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid."
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
"You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous russian and soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except thursday."
Taken from a menu, Poland:
"Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten in the country people's fashion."
Supermarket, Hong Kong:
"For your convenience, we recommend courteous, efficient self-service."
From the "Soviet Weekly":
"There will be a moscow exhibition of arts by 15,000 soviet republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years."
On the door of a Moscow hotel room:
"If this is your first visit to moscow, you are welcome to it."
A laundry in Rome:
"Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time."
Granddaughter: It’s March 14th grandpa, national “pi” day.
Grandpa: I love pie!
Granddaughter: Not that kind of pie grandpa, I’m talking about a formula!
Grandpa: Back in my day we called it a recipe!
Granddaughter: Graaaand Paaaa, not that, it’s a mathematical formula, you know an equation.
Grandpa: That’s the problem these days, everyone makes things so complicated. In my day we used things like cups, teaspoons and tablespoons. We didn’t need math if we wanted to bake a pie.
Granddaughter: Oh, I see your point! So what would you like, apple or cherry pie?
Grandpa: Finally, a young person who actually understand things.