Pilots jokes

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Tower: TWA 2341, for noise reduction turn right 45 Degrees.
TWA 2341: Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noice can we make up here?
Tower: Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?

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From unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue:
- I am fuскing bored!
Ground Traffic Control:
- Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediatelly!
Unknown aircraft:
- I said I was fuскing bored, not fuскing sтuрid!

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Two blind pilots enter a plane. They have sunglasses and white sticks. As the plane starts to move, the passengers are uncomfortable. The plane gains speed, but it stays on the ground. The remaining runway gets smaller and smaller, and the plane is rushing towards a fence. … …
…
The passengers start shrieking and suddenly the plane lifts, avoiding the fence at the last second. All the passengers calm down, thinking it was a bad joke.
In the pilot cabin, the co-pilot turns to the pilot and says :
“You know what? One day they’re going to scream too late, and we’re all going to die.”

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Bus drivers when they see each other. Pilots when they see each other

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Flight Control Center asks the pilot:
- Who is landing here?
The pilot decides to make a joke:
- Guess who, - he asks.
Flight Control Center turns off the lighting of the landing track and tells:
- Guess where..

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Airplane is landing at the airport. Pilots have a conversation:
- Look, what a short landing lane they have!
- But, you look, how wide it is!

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