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When you don't really understand the code base but add a new feature anyway
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How many Windows programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
472. One to write WinGetLight BulbHandle, one to write WinQueryStatusLight Bulb, one to write WinGetLightSwitchHandle.
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Don't worry honey, they call it my dual-channel RAM.
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I buy a lot of ringtones for someone who hasn't answered a phone call since 2008.
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Old Programmers do not die... they decompile.
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You're so dumb you thought quarter backs was a change machine.
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If Bill Gates had a penny for every time I had to reboot my computer ... Oh wait, he does.
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It's okay Microsoft Excel even my love life is not responding.
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Failure is not an option-it comes bundled with the software.
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You are one well-defined function!
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Computer does what you command him to do but not what you want from him.
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Our WIFI was down yesterday and I spent 45 minutes trying to fix it. Our dishwasher has been broken for 3 weeks and I haven't even touched it.
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Smartphones are pacifiers for adults.
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