School Jokes

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Teacher cracks down on Little Johnny:
“Come now, Johnny! Admit it. You had your parents help you with the homework, didn’t you?”
Little Johnny replies:
“Absolutely not. They did it all by themselves!“

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How does a school differ from an insane asylum?
Different phone numbers.

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Teacher: Marvin, please go outside the door and stay there.
Marvin: Why?
Teacher: Because your jabbering is very disruptive and nobody wants to listen to it.
Marvin: Then perhaps you should come along with me.

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A teacher shows Little Johnny a butterfly and asks, “Well, Johnny, what do we call this butterfly?”
Little Johnny says, “That’s a peacock butterfly.”
“Come on, Johnny, peacock butterflies aren’t green!”
“Well maybe this one isn’t ripe yet?”

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Fiona asks her daddy, “Dad, can you write with your eyes closed?”
“I believe I could, child, if I tried.”
“Excellent, do you think you would like to try it on my school report?”

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Why are there so few schools in the jungles of eastern Africa?
Because there are too many cheetahs.

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At school:
Johnny, where’s your homework?
Johnny: I’m very sorry, I don’t have it here.
Teacher: How come?
Johnny: I ate my exercise books.
Teacher: What?! Why would you do such a thing?!
Johnny: The dog refused to.

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My teacher said I should walk a mile in his shoes so
I’d know how hard it is to be a teacher. Now I‘m a mile away and I still
Don’t have any idea what he’s talking about.

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