School Jokes

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My science teacher asked me if I liked sodium
I said “Na.”

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Trying out new Arm-the-Teachers laws, a Texas teacher recently shot a student in the eye.
In the teacher's defense, it was a bad pupil.

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So my science teacher began her astronomy unit with star formation
She gave a stellar explanation.

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A teacher enters a class room for the first time.
He notices that two of the guys sitting together looks similar to each other. The teacher curiously asks them
Teacher :Are you guys twins?
Guys:No sir, we are neighbors.

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Little boy calls to his teacher
And says "James won't be in school today, he is sick"
Teacher replies "Oh, I am sorry to hear that. By the way who am i talking to,?"
Boy answers calmly "With my Dad"

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Teacher: We found drugs in your son's backpack
Parent: Oh wow, really?
Teacher: Yes, it's very concerning
Parent: Very.. *rubbing сhin*.. he should have sold them all by now

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My english teacher told me that the file I sent her was corrupt, and that she couldn't open it
I suggested bribing it

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My Latin/Greek teacher always gets the English and Greek 'U' mixed up
Oopsilon

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My English teacher said that nothing rhymes with orange.
There was a young man who had nothing,
Until one day he happened upon an orange.
That rhymes?

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Little Jimmy was sleeping in class when...
The teacher saw him dozing off and interrupted his nap.
He said in a stern tone:
"Jimmy, you know you can't sleep in class."
Jimmy retorted:
"Yeah, but if you were a little quieter I could."

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I bumped into my old English teacher.
He said,
"What's new?"
I said,
"It's an adjective."

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When I was a little kid, my dad would swear then say "Excuse my French"
One day the teacher asked if anyone could speak a foreign language and I raised my hand

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Before we left the room, our teacher told us all to pick up at least one piece of trash on our way out.
So as I walked out the classroom, I looked at her and said "Hey baby, here's my number, call me."

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A mexican boy in english class...
A mexican boy in english class passed a note to his friend. The teacher saw it, and screeched "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?"
To which he replied, "writing an esé"

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A yoga teacher was murdered...
... They're saying it was premeditated.

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My English teacher got really angry about the format of my essay.
It wasn't justified.

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Teacher said this one in class.... Why are there no Muslims in Star Trek?
Because it's the future.

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A joke from Civil War History Class today
Teacher asks:
'The southern plantations were very wealthy. Exactly how much of that wealth did the slaves get?'
Student answers:
'A whip'

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