School jokes, Teacher Jokes
I pride myself on being patient when teaching driver education, something I have done for 30 years. I have encountered many, many students, who didn't seem to be able to hit the floor with their hat. But one incident was just too much.
I had a sweet young thing behind the wheel for the first lesson of the semester. She had volunteered to go first and seemed ready to show the other two kids how well she could drive. We left the rural school and started toward town.
As we approached the first stop sign, the young lady gave no sign that she saw it. We got closer, but she still did not slow down. Finally, I used the "teacher's brake" pedal, on my side of the car, to get us stopped.
When I asked her why she didn't slow down to stop for the stop sign, she replied, "but, Mr. Smith, the speed limit is 35 ALL the way to the stop sign!"
One day, while strolling down the boardwalk, I bumped into an old friend of mine, Rob, from high school. “You look great Rob, how do you stay looking so young? Why you must be at least 65 already but you don’t look a day over 40!” I exclaimed.
“I feel like I’m 40 too!” replied Rob.
“That’s incredible,” I said, “Does it run in the family? How old was your dad when he passed?”
“Did I say he was dead?” asked Rob. “He’s 81 and is more active than ever. He just joined the neighborhood basketball team!” responded Rob.
“Whoa! Well, how old was your Grandfather when he died?”
“Did I say he died” asked Rob. “He just had his 105th birthday and plays golf and goes swimming each day! He’s actually getting married this week!"
“Getting married?!” I asked. If he’s 105, why on earth does he want to get married?!
Rob looked at me, smiled, and replied, “Did I say he wanted to?”