Donald Trump Jokes

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Americans won’t have a Thanksgiving Dinner this year. Why not? They sent their turkey to the White House.

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After getting in the White House, D.Trump gets a letter…
… from the Iranian president. He opens it and to his surprise there is a paper with a weird looking code on it:
370HSSV 0773H
All confused, Trump contacts the FBI and forwards the letter to them in hope they can figure out the meaning, but they weren’t able to. Trump gets angry and sends the letter to both the CIA and NSA, and they also fail to figure out the meaning of the letter.
One of the agents suggest Trump to ask for MI6’s help, so he does and few minutes after a British agent sends a fax to his secretary:
Tell your president he was holding the letter upside down.

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Decisions taken by world leaders often have great significance during a crisis.The Americans, in particular, are suffering many losses during the current global pandemic. Remember,In the 1980’s they had Ronald Reagan, Johnny Cash and Bob Hope.
In 2020 they have Donald Trump, no Cash and no Hope!

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Trump, Hillary, and Putin ran a marathon.
Trump wins, Putin finished last.
US newspapers: Hillary finished second.
Russian newspapers: Putin won.

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This Clown Craze has gone too far.
I mean think about it
Donald Trump President of America

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Trump hates saying "yes" to Mexicans so much
We may as well call him the "Not Si" President

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What did Donald Trump say after his attempt to hang himself failed?
"Fake Noose!"

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What do Trump and his supporters NOT have in common?
His supporters have a blind trust.

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So the American people's choices for President of the United States will most likely be Donald Trump or Hilary Clinton.
That's it. That's the joke. There is no punchline.

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Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump walk into a debate...
America says,
"What is this, a joke?"

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Why is it impossible to throw a вееr at Trump?
Because he's a draft dodger

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Why is Donald Trump always in the comments?
Because the real joke is always in the comments.

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How would Donald Trump have said "grab em by the p***y" if he was a Communist?
Seize the means of reproduction

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Despite the fact she is a Democrat, Monica Lewinsky decided to vote for Trump in the last election...
.... She said to her friend, "I'd like to vote for Hillary, but the last Clinton left a very foul taste in my mouth."

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Why can't President Trump ever finish reading a book?
Because everything he starts ends with chapter 11.

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Why does the Mexican Air Force stress out Donald Trump?
Bc he can’t stand the sound of twenty Juan pilots.

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What do atoms and President Trump have in common?
They make up everything

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Trump may have dodged the draft but he was still given honorary military ranks.
Private Tax Return,
Major Embarrassment,
Chief Petty Officer,
General Incompetence.

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