• Home
  • Joke Categories
  • Popular
  • Jokes From our facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/Jokes-441655979354080)
  • Funny pictures
  • Most popular
  • Newest jokes
  • Aviation Jokes
  • Christmas Jokes
  • Dad Jokes
  • Genie jokes
  • Gynaecology Jokes, Gynaecologist Jokes
  • Jewish Jokes
  • Jokes about Police Officers
  • Jokes From our facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/Jokes-441655979354080)
  • Knock-knock jokes
  • Lawyer Jokes
  • Masturbation jokes
  • Mother in law jokes
  • Nurse jokes
  • Old People Jokes
  • Political Joke
  • Psychology, Psychotherapy, and psychiatry jokes, Shrinks Jokes
  • Rude Jokes
  • Scots jokes, Scotsman Jokes, Scottish jokes, Scotland Jokes
  • Sex Jokes
  • Soccer jokes, Football jokes
  • Vulgar jokes
  • Weed Jokes
  • Animal Jokes
  • Blonde Jokes
  • Chuck Norris
  • Dark Humor
  • Dirty jokes
  • Doctor's jokes, Health Jokes, Medical joke
  • Donald Trump Jokes
  • Drunk Jokes, Drinking Jokes, Alcohol Jokes, Alcoholic Jokes, Beer Jokes
  • Gross jokes, Disgusting jokes
  • Jokes about Women
  • Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes
  • Marriage Jokes, Family Jokes
  • Putin jokes, Vladimir Putin Jokes
  • Religion jokes
  • School Jokes
  • Sports Jokes
  • Work Jokes, Office Jokes
Вицове за Животни English Tier-Witze, Tierwitze, Tier Wi... Chistes de animales про животных Blagues sur les animaux Barzellette Animali Ανέκδοτα με ζώα животни Hayvan Fıkraları, Hayvanlar Al... Анекдоти про Тварин, Анекдоти ... Piadas de Animais Dowcipy i kawały: Zwierzęta Djurvitsar, Djur-Skämt, Djur s... Dieren moppen, Dierenmop, Dier... Vitser om dyr Dyrevitser, Vitser om dyr Eläinvitsit Állatos viccek Bancuri Animale Anekdoty a vtipy o zvířátkách ... Anekdotai apie gyvūnus Anekdotes par dzīvniekiem Vicevi o životinjama
My Jokes Edit Profile Logout
  1. Newest jokes
  2. Animal Jokes

Animal Jokes

Add a joke Newest jokes Most popular
My girlfriend told me to take a spider out instead of кill it. ….
….
We went out and had a few drinks. Cool guy, wants to be a web designer.
0
0
4
I was reading that dogs can successfully sniff out cancer in humans.
Now I’m worried that I’ve got testicular cancer.
0
0
4
1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a sтuрid burned out bulb?
2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
3. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that sтuрid lamp!
4. Rottweiler: Make me.
5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.
6. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!
7. German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.
8. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.
9. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb?
10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still mess on the carpet in the dark.
11. Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.
12. Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there...
13. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
14. Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle ...
15. Poodle: I'll just вlоw in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.
The Cat's Answer:
"Dogs do not change light bulbs. HUmans change light bulbs.
0
0
4

Many times do you have to tickle a squid to Make it laugh? Ten tickles ! Lol
0
0
4
I had an awkward moment on Tuesday
I was having sεx with my girlfriend and my dog walked in the room.
Oh wait… it was the other way around.
0
0
4
When a male squirrel saw a female squirrel he said:
"I can offer you, DEEZ NUTS!"
0
0
4
“Please keep your dog beside you, sir,” a woman said crossly to the man sitting opposite to her on the bench at the park. “I can feel a flea in my shoe.” “Midnight, come here,” replied the man. “This woman has fleas.”
0
0
4
It was a very hot Wednesday here in Florida. Bessie, our Нuмр-Day Camel, stopped dead in her tracks.
I thought I might have to call for a tow truck to get a camel tow, but a camel expert said, “Seeing it’s such a hot day, give ‘er a swift kick in the аrsе.”
So I did. I got up on a ladder and gave Old Bessie a swift boot. She immediately proceeded to pass such an incredible fаrт, I thought I would pass out for lack of Oxygen.
The camel expert said, “Just as expected on a hot day. Vapor lock.”
0
0
4
Squirrels - nature's speed bumps.
0
0
4
My Chinese neighbour told me he’d just opened a “Crows shop”.
I said, “Don’t you mean a clothes shop?”
He said, “A Crows shop!”
I said, “OK, I might pop down for a Rook.”
0
0
4
What do you call a соw with two legs?
Lean Beef!
What do you call a соw with no legs?
Ground Beef!
What do you call it when a соw tries to jump over a barbed wire fence?
Udder Destruction!
0
0
4
It was a boring Sunday afternoon in the jungle so the Elephants decided to challenge the Ants to a game of soccer. The game was going well with the Elephants beating the Ants ten goals to nil, when the Ants gained possession. The Ants' star player was dribbling the ball towards the Elephants' goal when the Elephants' left back came lumbering towards him.
The elephant trod on the little ant, killing him instantly. The referee stopped the game. "What the hеll do you think you're doing? Do you call that sportsmanship, killing another player?" The elephant replied, "Well, I didn't mean to кill him -- I was just trying to trip him up."
0
0
4

Why is a kangaroo like a pool table?
They both have side pockets!
0
0
4
What do you call an Alligator in Rhythm
An Algorithme
0
0
4
It's never easy putting a pet to sleep. That's why we say things like, 'We decided to put Fluffy out of his misery.' No, what you decided was that Fluffy's company isn't worth $500.
0
0
4
Two bats and a bunny walk into a restaurant and order a round of pizzas. The waiter brings out the order, and when they're finished he says,
"That'll be 68 bucks, guys."
The bunny pays, and the waiter says,
"We don't get a lot of customers like you guys in here, you know."
The bunny says,
"At 68 bucks for three small pizzas, I'm not surprised."
0
0
4
It's funny, when I walk into a spider web I demolish his home and misplace his dinner yet I still feel like the victim.
0
0
4
Dogs are such smart animals. They're so intelligent because they mark their territory with urinе. They рее on it, they think it's theirs. That's so smart. Imagine if people did that -- the homeless would own everything.
0
0
4
  • Previous
  • Next

Privacy and Policy Contact Us