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Welcome to the abortion clinic. You make em, we scrape em. No fetus can beat us.
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Why are Trump’s ties so long?
Because they go all the way to Russia.
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One day Nathan came in ten minutes late to Mr Jones’s class. Mr Jones asked him, “Nathan, what do you have to say for yourself?” Nathan says,
"Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill. Then Dave came in a further ten minutes late to Mr Jones’s class. Mr Jones asked him, “Dave, what do you have to say for yourself?” Dave says,
"Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill. Then Mike came in a further ten minutes late to Mr Jones’s class. Mr Jones asked him, “Mike, what do you have to say for yourself?” Mike says,
"Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill. Then five minutes later a new girl walked in to Mr Jones’s lesson. Mr Jones is at the end of his tether now and says, “Who are you and why are you late?” The new girl says, “Sir, I’m called Cherry Hill”
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Did you know that towels are the leading cause of dry skin
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What did the skeleton say while riding his Harley Davidson motorcycle?
I’m воnе to be wild!
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A lady runs into a police station and yells “help, help”. I’ve been graped then a police officer says “Do you mean rареd”. The girl then replies “No there was a bunch of em”.
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I really hate waiting to die…
Its taking a lifetime
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Last halloween i went dressed as a woman. When i rang the doorbell an elderly woman opened and i made grunting noise and knocked the bowl of candy out of her hands. She immediately called the police and told them excactly what happened. The officer pulled me aside and asked me a few questions. First he asked are your parents here and i said nothing. Concerned by my answer he then asked if i was ok so i said nothing. He asked me what my name and i responded, "Hellen Keller.
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What happened when the semicolon broke grammar laws? – It was given two consecutive sentences.
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The only thing I do straight is vodka
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What do you call a lazy gаy?
Someone who comes straight out of the closet,and goes straight to the couch.
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Jason: Did you hear about the storm-trooper who attempted suicide?
Dave: No.
Jason: Well, he hit his first target.
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You’ll end up DEAD if you don’t stop COFFIN!!!
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When the school shooter kills the teacher and the autistic kid declares communism
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What did the North tower say to the south tower. “sorry can’t talk, got to catch a plane”
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How do you вlоw up an Indian person?
You press the red button.
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So I went out to eat the other day, and the waitress came up to me and asked if I wanted a glass of water. I said “Yes ma’am.” She said “Oh honey, you don’t have to call me ma’am, I’m not that old.” I said “Okay, thanks вiтсh.”
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What shoes do pedofiles wear? White vans. How do pedofiles fit in? They force it to go in. How do you make a 16 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedofile comes in. What did Santa say when he was passing over some hookers? “Но hо hо!”
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