Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

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What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas?
A pair of gloves!
Nah, I’m not that mean, he’s still trying to open his presents.

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Kid:what is between moms legs?
Dad:paridise.
Kid whats between you legs?
Dad:the key to paridise.
Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.

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So, Sатаn is in the delivery room having a child. Soon, a feathered creature comes out. “Doctor,” say Sатаn. “What is it?” The doctor sighs. “Well, it’s not a boy, and it’s not a girl.” Sатаn looks frustrated. “THEN WHAT IS IT?!?!?” The doctor looks up. “It’s a goose.”

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One of my sisters is pregnant for the fifth time. Spent 10 minutes with her four kids, and my ovaries tied themselves in a knot.

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What you mean behave?! He is doing a handstand!!

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Pretty safe to say he DID see us last night

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Pony 4 sale Great with kids

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How a Polish child does his homework? With Grandpa, with Grandma, with Mum, with Dad

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Son: I'm going on a date. Dad: Do you need any money? Son: No he'll pay

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English test Mom's toy Cactus

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- My child will not eat fish, what can I replace it with?
- A cat. Cats love fish.

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When I realize I'm a grown-up and can do whatever I want

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I took a picture of my son getting an award from his teacher

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If I have twin daughters, I'll name one Kate.
And I'll name the other DupliKate.

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That moment when there's more on your plate than you can eat

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A stork?! You have no idea what I’ve been through

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Hey mom, don't forget to set my alarm for 3am I have to cry

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