Men-Women jokes

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Silence doesn't mean your sеxuаl performance left her speechless.

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I saw a man yesterday who was so bald I could see what he was thinking.

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Like arguing with a forest fire.

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An angry woman can pack everything she owns in an hour, but it will take her a week to pack for vacation? Women...

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Time waits for no man, time is obviously a woman.

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What happened when the man fell in love with his garden? It made him wed his plants!

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Women still make 76 cents to every dollar a guy makes, and then we get told, 'Well, you chicks aren't good in math.' Well, you know why we're not good in math, Mr. Boss Man, Mr. Associate? It's because we know that things aren't equal.

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I'm not a manly guy, I'm not one of those guys like, 'Oh yeah, let's go eat some ham on the воnе!' Further illustrated by the fact that that's my example of what men are doing.

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What does a реnis and an ego have in common? All men have one!

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Men are fun to argue with, because even IF they win... they lose.

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What do you call a man who expects to have sеx on the second date? Slow.

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A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life, to be thankful for a good one.

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Shouldn't they put the words 'men' and 'women' on the bathroom doors? Just 'men' and 'women.' Sometimes, they get creative: they do pictures and symbols, and you've got to guess which one you are. People hate that. They have a few beers, and then they get down there, they're just like, 'Oh God, am I a compass or a thimble? Am I a jar of moths or a horse with skis? I just have to рее.'

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Men should be like coffee: strong, hot and not letting you sleep for the whole night. However, most of them are like copy machines: suitable only for reproduction.

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My girlfriend used to get upset because I left the toilet seat up. So, I don't do that anymore; I put it down. But there's no winning with her. Now she gets annoyed because it's covered in рiss.

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What do men and mascara have in common? They both run at the first sign of emotion.

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A woman about sеx has to know ‘why?' and a man ‘where?'

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Trying to understand women is like trying to smell color 9.

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