School Jokes

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TEACHER: Did your parents help with the homework John?
JOHN: Nope, I got them wrong all by myself.

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I recently ran into an old student of mine, who said, “I always liked you. You never had favorites."
"Why thank you," I replied.
Then he concluded with, "You were mean to everyone.”

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“Alfred, if I had 20 marbles in my right pants pocket, 20 marbles in my left pants pocket, 40 marbles in my right hip pocket and 40 marbles in may left hip pocket - what would I have?”
“Heavy pants, sir!”

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What is yellow and does not float well?
A School Bus

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What is green and looks like a school bus
A school bus

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What is better for bus drivers? A. Magic school bus 🚌

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Who’s a pineapple? I’m a pineapple…Yass
Teacher and kid
Kid: hey teacher: yes
Kid: would you punish me for something I didn’t do?
Teacher: of course not
Kid: well I didn’t do my homework

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So in class they were learning about where food comes from:
Teacher- so kids where does bacon come from?
Student- PIGS
Teacher- correct where does mutton come from?
Student- SHEEP
Teacher- and finally here’s your homework-
Student- IK where that comes from!
A fат соw!

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Me. mom would you get mad at me for something i didn’t do. mom. no. me ok good i didn’t do my homework

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I had a dog with an eating disorder. He wouldn’t eat any of my homework.

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I tour up my homework, but I then replaced it with this copy it may look like it but trust me its diffrenet! The answers ARE RIGHT better than left!

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I wasn’t understanding what I had to do for homework, so my teacher said “ Let me break it down for you like the twin towers.”

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Whats the difference between homework and a hоокеr? They both start with an “H” but we all know what one we would like to do.

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Hi! This is a good prank I did! Okay My sister has this crush and his name is Braylon so he text my sister saying he wants to hang out with her which I think means date so anyway I did this My text said “Hi braylon, I can’t hang out today…or the other day because I have homework, so please no hang out!” this is super wrong but funny! Braylon text back and said “Fine I can help” and I text back and said “Oh will come here around 10:00” And my sister did not know he was comeing…she was so embarrsed she was still in her night gown! HAHAHAH. O to the k bye thats the prankster!!!

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What do whales use to rub out a mistake in their homework? Their Blubber

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Which Star Wars ship is most likely to be unemployed with a crushing amount of student loan debt?
The Millenial Falcon

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What do you call an English teacher who used to have anxiety?
Past tense.

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My Indian engineering teacher told us this today
Growing up in America, you've probably heard your parents say, "Eat your food, there are starving children in India." But I tell my children, "Do your math homework or an Indian child will eat your food."

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