• Home
  • Joke Categories
  • Popular
  • Jokes From our facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/Jokes-441655979354080)
  • Funny pictures
  • Most popular
  • Newest jokes
  • Aviation Jokes
  • Christmas Jokes
  • Corona virus jokes (Covid - 19), Coronavirus
  • Dad Jokes
  • Genie jokes
  • Gynaecology Jokes, Gynaecologist Jokes
  • Jewish Jokes
  • Jokes about US Elections 2020 Trump vs Biden
  • Jokes From our facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/Jokes-441655979354080)
  • Knock-knock jokes
  • Lawyer Jokes
  • Masturbation jokes
  • Nurse jokes
  • Old People Jokes
  • Psychology, Psychotherapy, and psychiatry jokes, Shrinks Jokes
  • Rude Jokes
  • Scots jokes, Scotsman Jokes, Scottish jokes, Scotland Jokes
  • Sex Jokes
  • Vulgar jokes
  • Weed Jokes
  • Blonde Jokes
  • Chuck Norris
  • Dark Humor
  • Dirty jokes
  • Doctor's jokes, Health Jokes, Medical joke
  • Donald Trump Jokes
  • Drunk Jokes, Drinking Jokes, Alcohol Jokes, Alcoholic Jokes, Beer Jokes
  • Gross jokes, Disgusting jokes
  • Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes
  • Marriage Jokes, Family Jokes
  • Putin jokes, Vladimir Putin Jokes
  • Valentine's Day Jokes
Вицове за Коли и Шофьори, Авто English Auto Witze, AutoWitze, Motorra... Chistes de coches, Chistes de ... Шутки про машины и водителей Blagues sur les Voitures, Blag... Barzellette sulle macchine e s... Ανέκδοτα για αυτοκίνητα και οδ... Вицеви за коли и возачи Şoför Fıkraları Анекдоти - Автомобільні Piadas sobre carros e motorist... Żarty o samochodach i kierowca... Bilskämt Auto moppen, Chauffeu Vittigheder om biler og chauff... Bilvitser Autovitsit, Rattijuopot, Rekka... Autós viccek, Motoros viccek, ... Bancuri Soferi Vtipy o autech a řidičích Anekdotai apie vairuotojus, An... Anekdotes par auto un notikumi... Vicevi o automobilima i vozači...
My Jokes Edit Profile Logout
  1. Newest jokes
  2. Car and driving jokes

Car and driving jokes

Add a joke Newest jokes Most popular
When Chuck Norris drives a Lamborghini, people assume the Llamborghini is compensating for something.
30
0
4
A gypsy man buys land next to the house of a doctor.
He hires an engineer and then gets him build an identical house.
When he finished the house, the gypsy man comes to the balcony and shouts the doctor.
"Doctor – Doctor!"
"What is you gypsy eh?"
The doctor says. "Well, maybe you don’t like me but we are the same because we have the same house!"
"No way, the doctor says, because we do not have the same furniture..." the gypsy man angry as he is, oders the same furniture and he comes to the balcony again.
"Doctor – Doctor! We have the same house, the same furniture, we are the same ourselves!"
"What are you saying you sтuрid gypsy do we have the same car?" the doctor says. and shows at his luxurious MERCEDES in the garage.
Angrier the gypsy man gets loans and buy an identical MERCEDES and goes back to the balcony.
"Doctor – Doctor!"
"What do you want again eh?" doctor says
"I am “better” than you!"
"Why is that eh?" doctor says.
"We own the same house, furniture and same car, right?" The gypsy says.
"I agree, but do these make you better than me?" the doctor says.
"Because I have a neighbor doctor, and you have a neighbor Gypsy!Ha!"
30
0
4
A policeman spots a woman driving and knitting at the same time.
Driving up beside her, he shouts out the window... "Pull over!"
"No," she shouts back, "a pair of socks!"
30
0
4

What's a rabbits favourite car?
Any make, just as long it's a hutchback.
30
0
4
A blonde was driving down the road listening to the radio and was quite upset when she heard blonde joke after blonde joke.
A little way down the road, she saw another blonde out in a field rowing a boat.
The blonde stopped her car and angrily jumped out yelling, "You dumb blonde вiмво! It's blondes like you that give the rest of us a bad name! If I could swim I'd come out there and give you what's coming to you!"
30
0
4
Why did the blonde fail her drivers liscence?
She wasn't used to the front seat!
30
0
4
Биг Бен Big-Ben Hvorfor findes der ikke længere blondiner i London? - De fandt ud af De ce a venit o blonda dezamagita din Anglia?A aflat ca BIG BEN este un ceas Kun blondi pääsi Englantiin Waarom komt een Domblondje teleurgesteld uit Engeland? Ze is er achter gekomen dat de BigBen een KLOK is. Hvorfor blev blondinen skuffet... Hvorfor blev blondinen skuffet da hun kom til London? Hun fandt ud af Warum sind Blondinen mit ihrer Reise nach London unzufrieden? Sie haben herausgefunden
Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England?
She found out Big Ben was only a clock.
29
0
4
Q: Why did the turkey cross the road?
A: Because he wasn't a chicken.
29
0
4
Q: Why does a chicken coop only have two doors?
A: If it had four, it would be a sedan.
29
0
4
So Little Johnny's teacher is warned at the beginning of the school year not to ever make a bet with Johnny unless she is absolutely sure she will win it.
One day in class, Johnny raises his hand and says "teacher, I'll bet you $50 I can guess what color your underwear is."
She replies, "okay, meet me after class and we'll settle it." But beforeclass ends, she goes to the restroom and removes her раnтiеs.
After class is over and the studentsclear out, Johnny makes his guess.
"Blue."
"Nope. You got it wrong," she says as she lifts her skirt to reveal she isn't wearing any underwear.
"Well come with me out to my dads car, he's waiting for me, and I'll get you the money." She follows him out.
When they get to the car she informs his dad that he got the bet wrong and that she showed Johnny that she wasn't wearing any underwear.
His dad exclaims: "That mother fuскеr! He bet me $100 this morning that he'd see your рussy before the end of the day!"
29
0
4
Man walks over to a lady in a bar and asks "whats your name ?"
"Carmen" she replies,... "I like cars and men ! Whats yours ?"
The man looks her up and down and sayes "Beerpussy ..."
29
0
4
Q: Did you know that they had automobiles in Jesus' time?
A:Yes, the Bible says that the disciples were all of one Accord.
29
0
4

What do you call a truck full of dildоs?
Toys for Тwатs.
29
0
4
Исповед Was ist ein schöner Tot? - Искам да умра мирно и кротко в съня си - като дядо Най-смешния виц в Шотландия според едногодишно изследване на учени от университета в Хардфордшир: Ich möchte so sterben wie mein opa - einfach einschlafen!!!!!!!!! (runterscrollen) Nicht weinend und schreiend!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wie sein Beifahrer. When I die Il maestro chiede alla classe: "Secondo voi qual è una morte tranquilla?" Wenn ich sterbe Ik wil graag dood gaan wanneer ik slaap “Når jeg dør Chcę umrzeć spokojnie Moi je voudrais mourir comme mon grand-père Eu quero morrer em paz Haluaisin kuolla kuten lentokapteenina toiminut isäni Mannen på begravningen: - Jag skulle vilja dö som min far: stillsamt och i sömnen. Inte skrikande i panik som hans passagerare... Charlando sobre la muerte: - A mí lo que me gustaría es morir durmiendo apaciblemente To mand sidder på en bænk og er lidt småfilosofiske. Der tales om livet og døden. - Jeg vil sove stille ind Un professeur demande à ses élèves un exemple d'une belle mort. Une petite fille lève la main et dit: - Mon papi ! Il est mort en dormant... - Effectivement c'est une belle mort Jeg vil dø mens jeg sover
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
29
0
4
What do your parents' car and testicles have in common?
Hit either one of them and you're grounded.
29
0
4
Q: If there are two potheads in the back of a car, then who is driving?
A: The cop!
29
0
4
Traffic was backed up for miles, the police were going car to car.
When they got to my car I asked the officer what was going on.
He said "It's O.J. again. He's up there threatening to set himself on fire!
We are going car to car collecting donations."
"Donations!" I said, "How much you got so far?"
He said "about ten gallons."
29
0
4
Q: Why do schools in West Virginia only have Drivers Ed two days a week?
A: Because they need their cars for Sеx Ed the other three days a week!
29
0
4
  • Previous
  • Next

Privacy and Policy Contact Us