Animal Jokes

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What do you call an obnoxiously loud fog horn? A beginner saxophonist

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Why shouldn’t you play basketball 🏀 with a pig 🐷?
Because he’s a ball hog.

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What is a pig’s 🐷 favorite pie 🥧 ?
Mississippi Mud.

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What do you say when you see a pig making bread?
He’s bacon.

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So in class they were learning about where food comes from:
Teacher- so kids where does bacon come from?
Student- PIGS
Teacher- correct where does mutton come from?
Student- SHEEP
Teacher- and finally here’s your homework-
Student- IK where that comes from!
A fат соw!

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Beth was from Spain and she had a pig what did they call her
(Beth)-(la)-(ham)

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What is the oldest animal in the world?
A zebra - it is black and white.

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Nothing lasts long these days! As Confucius says - Hare today, gone tomorrow!

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How many animals can you fit in a pair of underpants??? A. A соск and a few hairs (hares)

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What happened when 800 hares got loose in the center of town?
The cops had to comb through the area.

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My mom wanted me to brush my hair.
And I just told her that even pet animals don’t like there hare brushed…

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Two rabbits were racing. Neither could get a-head, so they ended in a hare-tie!

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Where do you mix a bunny and a hare
Bunny hare

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Can a cook and clean for real no i do not want no rabbit hare in my house.

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Did you know they tested the Mars rover against animal attacks?
They had to switch to dogs because Curiosity killed the cat.

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Today I chopped up Onion for dinner and it made me cry. I guess it's true that you grow an attachment to an animal after you give it a name
He was a good dog

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A man and his son walk into a zoo and the only animal is a dog
The man looks to his son and says "this is a ShihTzu"

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What you call an animal that moos?
A соw, duмваss.

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