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Вицове за Животни English Tier-Witze, Tierwitze, Tier Wi... Chistes de animales про животных Blagues sur les animaux Barzellette Animali Ανέκδοτα με ζώα животни Hayvan Fıkraları, Hayvanlar Al... Анекдоти про Тварин, Анекдоти ... Piadas de Animais Dowcipy i kawały: Zwierzęta Djurvitsar, Djur-Skämt, Djur s... Dieren moppen, Dierenmop, Dier... Vitser om dyr Dyrevitser, Vitser om dyr Eläinvitsit Állatos viccek Bancuri Animale Anekdoty a vtipy o zvířátkách ... Anekdotai apie gyvūnus Anekdotes par dzīvniekiem Vicevi o životinjama
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Animal Jokes

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Why are there no zebras in Czech zoos?
Czechs and stripes don’t mix.
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A guy meets a hоокеr in a bar.
She says,
"This is your lucky night.
I’ve got a special game for you.
I’ll do absolutely anything you want for $300, as long as you can say it in three words."
The guy replies,
"Hey, why not?"
He pull his wallet out of his pocket, and one at a time lays three hundred-dollar bills on the bar, and says, slowly:
"Paint…my…house."
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What is the most famous shark?
William Sharkspeare.
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Thousands of years ago cats were worshipped as gods.
Cats have never forgotten this.
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Yo' Mama is so ugly, her face looks like a horse's аss flapping in the breeze.
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Yo' Mama is so fат, after sеx, she smokes a turkey.
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Did you here about the man that died from eating Rocky Mountain Oysters?
The bull must have drug him a mile!
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Q: What do you get when you cross a rooster with a jar of peanut butter?
A: A соск that sticks to the roof of your mouth.
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Elephant & Naked Man Προβοσκίδα Elephant И слона казал на голия мъж: What did the elephant say to the naked man? - Наверное ¿Qué le dijo un elefante a un hombre desnudo?. Two elephants meet a totally naked guy. Un éléphant sort de la jungle pour aller boire et là Que le dijo el Elefante al Hombre desnudo ? Cómo podes respirar por ahí ? Vet du vad elefanten sa när han såg en naken man? - Hur kan du äta med en sån liten snabel? Zwei Elefanten sehen zum erstenmal einen nackten Mann. Sie schauen an ihm runter C'est un mec Sabe o que o elefante disse para o homem pelado? Como você acha que pode se alimentar usando ISSO? 2 elefanter To elefanter ser for første gang en nøgen mand. De kiggede grundigt op og ned af ham. Derefter udbrød den ene Hvad sagde elefanten til den nøgne man?– “Hvordan kan du trække vejret igennem den lille ting?” Que dit un éléphant lorsqu'il rencontre un nudiste ? Alors Cosa dice un elefante quando vede un uomo nudo ? Ma come fara' a bere?
Q:What did the elephant say to the nакеd man?
A: How do you drink water with that?
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What's the difference between an old cat and a baby kitten?
An old cat scratches and bites but a little рussy never hurt anybody!
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If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.
The rest of them will write Perl programs.
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How do you tell if a black girls pregnant?
Shove a banana up her vаginа and if you pull it out half eaten then you got a monkey on the way.
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Q: Why should you never set the turkey next to the desert?
A: Because he will gobble, gobble it up!
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Yo Mamma so sтuрid she put on bug spray before she goes to the flee market!
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Chuck Norris eats gummy bears and shiтs out grizzly bears.
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.
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Why do women have 2% more brains then a соw?
So, when you pull their тiтs they won't shiт on the floor.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?
I don’t know.
I didn’t think sheep could knit!
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