Dirty jokes

Add a joke Newest jokes Most popular

If pepper spray counts, then yes, I have dated a few squirters.

0

0

Them: My d*ck is вiggеr than yours!
You: You saw your mom today!?

0

0

What grows in your hands when u hold it ? This Dicckkkk

0

0

Intimacy is selfish: into me see.

0

0

Q. What does an airport and a рrоsтiтuте have in common?
A. They both ask you to put your liquids into a little plastic bag.

0

0

Can’t believe I’ve just been arrested for rаре. She told me she was a fortune teller so she must have known it was gonna happen.

0

0

Did you know that, in German, ‘gross’ means large? That’s what my German girlfriend said when she first saw my реnis. I’ve also found that non-German women also use this word quite a lot.

0

0

Went shopping earlier today and got my wife something for her vaggina as a Christmas present, it’s called ‘DE-ICER’.

0

0

*to the tune of jingle bells*
Twerky sluт,
Twerky sluт,
Get the fuск way
We don't want no mily Cyrus jr
Messing up our day
Hay!
Twerky sluт,
Twerky sluт,
Stop I'm gonna be sick
For God's sake your made of plastic
None of yous legit
Hey
Twerky sluт..
Jerk: Hey b*tch ain't got no time for Christmas Carols!

0

0

Girl: Daddy, how are babies made?
Dad: Daddy plants a seed in mommy's tummy.
Girl: Does she swallow the seed?
Dad: Only if she wants new shoes.

0

0

Dad : Hey son, do you wanna hear a joke?
Son : Sure!
Dad : Sex
Son : I don't get it..
Dad : And you never will

0

0

I've got a yardarm you can hang from! Yar!

0

0

I hate those posts that say "taking off your вrа at the end of the day is the best feeling you ever felt, guys will never understand". Guys like it just as much as girls do.

0

0

Why are women like KFC? After you've finished with the thigh and вrеаsтs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your воnе in.

0

0

Favorite dis if you love some рussy. lame dis shiт if u les or gay

0

0

During our time together, I've experienced everything from premature еjасulатiоn to erectile dysfunction and everything in between -- not that there's been all that much.

0

0

Tried to give myself a sеx change earlier today but I couldn’t quite pull it off.

0

0

Doctor: Jim, please listen to me.
Jim: I am doctor.
Doctor: You'll have to stop маsтurватing.
Jim: WHAT?
Doctor: When people talk, we do not маsтurвате.

0

0