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Вицове за Евреи
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Σε τι διαφέρει....
Каква е разликата между пицата и евреина?
Vad är det för skillnad på en jude och en pizza? Pizzan håller tyst när den skickas in i ugnen.
Vad är skillnaden på en jude och en pizza? En pizza skriker inte när man puttar in den i ugnen.
Quelle est la différence entre un vieux et une pizza ? La pizza ne hurle pas quand tu la mets au four.
Qu'elle est la différence entre un juif et une pizza ?? Avez-vous déjà aperçu une pizza tapé à la porte du four ?
Sabe qual a diferença entre um judeu e a pizza? R: É que a pizza não reclama antes de ir pro forno...
Pizza Hvad er forskellen på en Jøde og en pizza? – Pizzaen skriger ikke når de bliver puttet i ovnen
Hvad er foreskellen mellem en jøde og en pizza? Pizzaen skriger ikke når du sætter den i ovnen Omkring 10 kroner Du tager pizzaen ud i ét stykke
¿Cuál es la diferencia entre una pizza y un judío? - Cuando metes la pizza al horno no grita.
Verschil tussen een pizza en een jood ? Een pizza schreeuwt niet in de oven
Τι διαφορά εχει μια πιτσα απο ενα Εβραιο...! Η πιτσα στον φουρνο δεν ουρλιαζει!
Quel est la différence entre une pizza et des juifs ? Les pizzas ne toquent pas à la porte du four
Qual a diferença entre a pizza e o judeu? A pizza não esperneia quando vai para o forno.
Whats the difference between a pizza and a jew?
A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.
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Нiтlеr: I asked for a glass of juice, not gas the Jews!
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How to tell who is Jewish in your class, drop a penny and see who gets their first.
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How do you get a Jewish girl's number?
You pull up her sleeve.
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A man in a balaclava with a gun asked, "Are you a Protestant or a Catholic?"
"Neither, I'm a Jew."
"But are you a Protestant Jew or a Catholic Jew?"
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Knock knock?
Who's there?
Hitler!
Hitler who?
You Know, the man who kills jews.
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One day a Jew was giving an Asian a вlоwjов, then, the Asian said do you have homework.
The Jew said no and they continued the вlоwjов.
Adam was waiting outside for a long time before he decided to walk in.
He walked in to find the Jew getting it up the вuм.
Adam decided he wanted to get some action too, so he walked up and took a swing at the Asian.
The Asian died and then the Jew yelled Aluakbah and bombed everyone.
Note: they were all boys.
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Нiтlеr is daddy!
Hump me!
Fuck me!
Daddy better gas them Jews.
My gas chambers love the smoke.
G-g-gas the Jews.
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A teacher asks the class, “What are some examples of flammable objects?” and the Jewish student raises his hand.
The teacher replies, “Very good! Any other examples?”
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Еврейски момък ме покани на среща. Попита ме за номера ми.
Имах среща с еврейско девойче.
Излизах с еврейка на среща и тя ме попита за номера ми. Аз и казах че ние имаме имена ...
J'ai eu un rencard avec une juive et elle m'a demandé mon numéro... Je lui ai répondu que nous
A while ago I had a blind date with a Jewish girl She asked me for my number. I told her that we usually use names.
ATTENTION HUMOUR TRÈS NOIR! Veuillez ne pas crié au retour d'Hitler après cette blague : Tu est toujours là? T'a du courage alors voilà mon histoire: Un jour j'ai eu un rencard avec une juive
I met a Jewish girl today and she asked for my number
I told her we use names here
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Why haven't I ever met a full blooded jew?
All of the ones I've met have just been Jew-ish
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A waiter walks up to a table full of Jewish women dining
And says "ladies, is anything ok?"
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Еврейски момък ме покани на среща. Попита ме за номера ми.
Имах среща с еврейско девойче.
Излизах с еврейка на среща и тя ме попита за номера ми. Аз и казах че ние имаме имена ...
J'ai eu un rencard avec une juive et elle m'a demandé mon numéro... Je lui ai répondu que nous
I met a Jewish girl today and she asked for my number I told her we use names here
ATTENTION HUMOUR TRÈS NOIR! Veuillez ne pas crié au retour d'Hitler après cette blague : Tu est toujours là? T'a du courage alors voilà mon histoire: Un jour j'ai eu un rencard avec une juive
A while ago I had a blind date with a Jewish girl
She asked me for my number.
I told her that we usually use names.
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No matter who wins the presidential election, it will be historic.
We'll either have the first female president, the first Jewish president, the first Canadian president, or the last president.
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A young black Jew asks his father, "Dad, am I more black or more Jew?"...
"Why do you ask?" asks the Dad.
The boy says,
"Well, a guy at school has a bike for sale for $150 and I can't decide if I want to haggle him down to $100, or just steal it."
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I had a date with a jewish girl.
After date she asked me for a number.
I told her we don't have numbers, we have names.
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A Black Jewish Boy Runs Home To His Dad...
He asks his father, "Dad am I more Jewish or more black?"
"Why do you care?" responds the father.
"Because there is a kid selling a bike for $50 and I am considering whether to bargain for $40 or just steal it!"
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Зет/хирург
Тъста е на операционната маса. Предстои операция от зетя-хирург.
An elderly man was on the operating table, about to be operated on by his son, a famous surgeon. Just before they put him under, he asked to speak to his son:
"Don’t be nervous, boy, just do your best and just remember, if it doesn’t go well, if something happens to me… your mother is going to come and live with you and your family."
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