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Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Justin
Justin who?
Justin time for dinner!
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I saw some ducks practicing their teenage girl faces at the pond today.
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There is three kids sitting at the lunch table one day.
One kid ask what do you call a mixed baby? One replies a zebra,another replies a mistake and the third one replies. Rape
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Handy hint: Feed your baby onions so you can find it in the dark.
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Why do ghetto people always name their kids things they cant afford like Diamond, Mercedes, Car Insurance?
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Little Johnny was watching TV with his mother.
Johnny:
"Why is this тамроn commercial so long?"
Mother:
"This is my favorite show called 90210."
Johnny: ...
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What bounces and makes kids cry?
My donation cheque to Children in Need.
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What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street?
Put them in a barking lot.
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What do you say when you meet a two-headed monster?
Hello, hello.
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Why did the cat sleep with a fаn on?
He wanted to be a cool cat.
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They said the baby looked like me.
Until they turned him the right way up.
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Η ΜΑΘΗΤΡΙΑ ΣΤΗΝ ΔΑΣΚΑΛΑ
Η τιμωρία.....
- Кажи Иванчо?
Учителката само што влегува на час, а Зоки Поки веднаш крева рака.
Иванчо към учителката:
Student: "would you ever punish me for something I didn
Toto se plaint à un ami,
Pierino: "Signora maestra si puo
Un alunno di 5° elementare si alza in piedi non appena entra la maestra e le chiede:
One day a boy came home running while crying.
"Herr Lehrer," fragt Fritzchen den Klassenlehrer. "kann man für etwas bestraft werden, was man nicht getan hat?"
PUPIL: "Would you punish me for something I did not do?" TEACHER:" Of course not." PUPIL: "Good, because I haven
"Kann man für etwas bestraft werden was man gar nicht gemacht hat?", fragt Fritz den Lehrer. Lehrer antwortet: "Nein kann man nicht." Fritz: "Gut, ich hab nämlich meine Hausaufgabe nicht gemacht!"
C
Sınıfa yeni gelen öğrenci ikinci gün öğretmenine sorar " Öğretmenim insana yapmadığı bir şey için ceza verir misiniz ?" Öğretmeni "olur mu öyle şey evladım neden insana yapmadığı bir şey için ceza...
Ma mère m
Girl: “Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn’t do.” Mother: “But that’s terrible! I’m going to have a talk with your teacher about this … by the way, what was it that you...
- Fröken kan man få skäll för något man inte har gjort? - Nej, varför undrar du det Pelle? - Jag har inte gjort läxan!
Det var en pojke som frågade sin fröken: - Fröken, kan man få skäll för nåt man inte har gort? - Nej, sa fröken. - Bra, för jag har inte gjort läxan!!!
Joãozinho chega para a professora e pergunta: — Professora, alguém pode ser culpado por alguma coisa que não fez? — Mas é claro que não, Joãozinho! — Ufa! Eu não fiz o dever de casa.
Jantje zat in de klas en vroeg aan de meester: "Meester, word je gestraft voor iets dat je niet gedaan hebt?" Waarop de meester antwoordde: "Natuurlijk niet Jantje, als je niets gedaan hebt, waarom...
Hr. lærer, man må ikke straffe nogen, der ikke har lavet noget, vel, hr. lærer? Selvfølgelig ikke, Brian. Hvorfor kommer du dog på det? For jeg har ikke lavet min regneopgave!
– Frøken, kan man bli straffet for noe man ikke har gjort? – Nei, Petter, det kan man ikke. – Puh, det var flaks, jeg har nemlig ikke gjort leksene.
Toto arrive gentillement et dit à sa maitresse: - Est ce qu
Na začátku hodiny se přihlásil Pepíček: „Paní učitelko, mohu být potrestán za něco, co jsem neudělal?” „No, to v žádném případě, Pepíčku.” „Tak to mi spadl kámen ze srdce - já jsem totiž neudělal...
- Apu, meg lehet büntetni valakit azért, amit nem csinált? - Nem, kisfiam. Mit nem csináltál? - Házi feladatot...
En el colegio: - Señorita profesora, ¿verdad que no se debe castigar a un niño por una cosa que no haya hecho? - No, claro que no. - Estupendo, no he hecho los deberes.
Toto demande à se maîtresse : - Madame ! Est-ce que c
Ali o günkü derslerini hazırlamamıştı. Sınıfa öğretmenin girdiğini görünce parmağını kaldırır ve: - Öğretmenim bir insana yapmadığı bir şey için ceza verilir mi? - Verilmez oğlum. - O halde ben...
Eleven till läraren: - Kan man få skäll för något man inte gjort ? Läraren: - Nej. Eleven: - Bra, för jag har inte gjort läxan !
Jantje vraagt aan de leraar: "Meneer, kan iemand ook gestraft worden voor iets wat dat hij niet gedaan heeft?" Leraar: "Nee, dat is niet eerlijk. Maar waarom vraag je dat?" Jantje: "Ik heb mijn...
PepitO le dice a su profesora: Profe usted me castigaria por algo q yo nom ice...?¿ Y la profesora, con sierta risa le dice: No Pepito como crees que te voy a castigar por algo que no iciste... Y...
Llega pepito a donde su maestra: - Maestra, ¿usted castigaria a un niño que no ha hecho nada? - Pues, no, no tendria porque hacerlo. ¿Pero porque preguntas Pepito? - Por nada, ahora sencillamente...
Küçük kız okuldan gelir ve annesine: - Annecim,bugün okulda yapmadığım bir şey yüzünden cezalandırıldım. Annesi yüksek sesle: - Ama, bu nasıl olur? Okula gelip öğretmeninle bu konu hakkında...
Little Johnny asks the teacher, “Mrs Roberts, can I be punished for something I haven’t done?”
Mrs Roberts is shocked, “Of course not, Johnny, that would be very unfair!”
Little Johnny is relieved, “OK Mrs Roberts, sorry, I haven’t done my homework.”
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What is height of Laziness?
Adopting a child.
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A man married an illiterate wife.
After two years of marriage, they gave birth to a son called EFe.
One day his mother asked him to read is multiplication table and he started immediately but when he reached 4multiply by 4 he mistakingly said 8 they mother angrily slapped him and told him the answer wasn't 8 but 44.
The boy cried and reported what happened to the father, the father took him back and angrily told the wife to tell him the correct answer and the woman hurriedly say 4mutiply by 4 is it not 44.
The man now calmed down and sai d u are Lucky that you got the answer if not I would have disgraced you here.
I hope they are all brilliant.
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A man is driving his five year old to a friend’s house when another car races in front and cuts them off, nearly causing an accident.
"Dоuсhеваg!" the father yells.
A moment later he realizes the indiscretion, pulls over, and turns to face his son.
"Your father just said a bad word," he says.
"I was angry at that driver, but that was no excuse for what I said. It was wrong. But just because I said it, it doesn’t make it right, and I don’t ever want to hear you saying it. Is that clear?"
His son looks at him and says:
"Too late, dоuсhеваg."
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One day Pepito was having a shower with his father when he saw his fathers реnis.
He asked his father what it was and his father replied "this is my racing car".
The next night Pepito heard moaning in his parents room, being curious he peeped in to see what was happening.
He then saw his father on top of his mother, while looking his father saw him and told him to go to his room.
"OK, but I'm not sure you're driving that racing car properly" replied Pepito.
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A mother found out she was pregnant and told the good news to anyone who would listen.
One day when mother and son were shopping, a woman asked the little boy if he was excited about the new baby.
‘Yes!’ the four-year-old said.
‘And I know what we are going to name it, too.
If it's a girl we're going to call her Mary, and if it's another boy we're going to call it quits!'
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What does Superman, Batman, and Ironman have in common?
When they were kids they wanted to be Chuck Norris
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