A city guy buys a ranch. He sits on the porch of his new house taking in the fresh country air when a dusty truck pulls up.
"Howdy, neighbor!" calls the man in the truck. " I came to invite you to a little Welcome to the Neighborhood party at my place tonight. "
"Well, that's mighty fine of you," the city guy replies.
"It's going to be great," the neighbor adds. "There's gonna be eatin', drinkin', fightin', and f**kin'!"
"Sounds great," the city guy replies. "What should I wear?"
"Aww, it don't matter," the neighbor says. "It's just gonna be you and me!"
Once there was a guy that went in a whоrеhоusе and says, What can I get for five bucks?
The madam says, Second door on the right and f**k whatever is there. He goes, sees a pig, figured Whaddya want for five bucks? and f**ks it. The next week he comes back and asks what he can get for $20. The madam says, Second floor, second door on the right, watch what happens. He goes in, sits down and looks down, he sees a glass floor with a view of a guy f**king a chicken on the first floor. He says to the man next to him, Look at him with the chicken. That's crazy. The guy responds, You shoulda been here last week - some guy was f**king a pig!