There was an older man who'd married a younger woman. All was going well... except in the bedroom. He couldn't last long enough to satisfy her. She said it didn't matter but he knew it was getting her down. So he went to the doctor and asked for help.
The doctor recommended that he satisfy himself before they have sеx - that way, he'd last longer. The next day, the man planned on ravishing his wife when he came home, and decided to please himself on the way. So he pulled over onto a quiet road. But he couldn't just sit there in his car having a wаnк, so he decided to lie under the car and pretend that he was fixing he car. He crawled under the car, closed his eyes, imagined his wife nакеd, and started wanking. After a while he felt something tugging at his jeans.
"Sir, this is the police. Would you mind telling us what you're doing?"
Not wanting to lose this wonderful image of his wife he kept his eyes closed.
"I'm just fixing the axle of my car, officer."
"Well, while you're down there you'd better check the brakes. Your car has crashed into a tree half a mile down the road!"
There was a woman who was interested in getting a воов job, so she went to her doctor, Dr.
Smith and questioned him about implants. He explained that, before you do anything too serious, there is a method that has worked for a lot of my patients. Every morning when you wake up rub your воовs and say ''Scoobie doobie doobie, give me вiggеr воовiеs.'' She did this faithfully for weeks and noticed one day that they actually were getting вiggеr, she was very impressed.
One morning she woke up, late for work and very rushed. By the time she got on the bus she realized that she forgot to go through her routine. So standing on the bus, while rubbing her воовs she says ''Scoobie doobie doobie, give me вiggеr воовiеs''. The man standing next to her says, ''You go to Dr. Smith?'' ''Yes,'' she said, ''how did you know?'' He replies ''Hickory dickory dock!''