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Kyle:
"Dude, why is my netflix DVD out in the snow?"
Ben:
"Well, I heard the coolest thing on the internet right now is netflix and CHILL!"
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Any room is a panic room if you've lost your phone in it.
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I think my neighbor is stalking me as she’s been googling my name on her computer.
I saw it through my telescope last night.
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Guy 1: Hey! Why do you smoke cigarettes even though there is a warning on the pack that says it's bad for your health?
Guy 2: I am a software professional. I don't bother about warnings -- I am concerned only about the "Alerts."
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I've snagged so many catfish on dating sites, I'm now a licensed fisherman.
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A clean house is the sign of a broken computer.
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Baby, you make my floppy disk turn into a hard drive
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10 Arten von Menschen 10 Τύποι 10 вида хора (двоично) Съществуват 10 вида хора. Тези които разбират двоичен код Es gibt genau 10 Typen von Menschen. Solche There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary and those who have regular sex. Il y a 10 types de personnes dans le monde : ceux qui comprennent le binaire et les autres. Et ceux qui ne s'attendaient pas à ce que cette blague soit en base 3 Hay 10 tipos de personas Es gibt 10 Arten von Menschen in der Welt. Die einen verstehen das Binärsystem und die anderen nicht! Ci sono 10 categorie di persone: chi comprende il sistema binario e chi non lo comprende. Existem somente 10 tipos de pessoas no mundo inteiro: Aquelas que entendem binário e aquelas que não entendem. Ci sono solo 10 tipi di persone al mondo… quelle che comprendono il binario e quelle che non lo comprendono. Det finns tio typer av människor: De som förstår binära och de som inte gör det. Exista 10 tipuri de oameni: cei care inteleg numerele binare si cei care nu. Існує 10 типів людей: ті Et finns ju 10 typer av människor
There are 10 kinds of people:
1. Those who understand binary.
10. Those who don't understand this joke.
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My internet is so slow, it's just faster to drive to the Google headquarters and ask them shiт in person.
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My voicemail message is just instructions on how to send a text message with brief pauses filled with heavy sighing.
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There's not just a straight temperature app on my smartphone. At least not a fahinhieght one there is always a cell-sius built in .
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The first time I got a universal remote control, I thought to myself "This changes everything".
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Computer novices may feel like they're alone these days, but the following call to IBM's help center show there are plenty of people out there who still are inching onto the information superhighway.
After a caller gave a technician her PC's serial number, he scanned a database of registered users and responded, "I see you have an Aptiva" desktop unit.
Before he could say another word, the caller shrieked and said she'd be right back. When the customer returned, the technician asked if she was all right. The caller responded, "Had I realized you could see me, I never would have telephoned in my bathrobe."
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Our WIFI was down yesterday and I spent 45 minutes trying to fix it. Our dishwasher has been broken for 3 weeks and I haven't even touched it.
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Computer does what you command him to do but not what you want from him.
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You are one well-defined function!
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Failure is not an option-it comes bundled with the software.
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It's okay Microsoft Excel even my love life is not responding.
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