While I was dining out with my children, a man came over to our table and we started talking. He asked where my kids go to school. I told him we home-schooled them. With a raised eyebrow, he asked if my husband is the sole breadwinner for our family.
I said,
"No, I also work, out of our home."
Then, noticing our two-month-old son, he mentioned that his daughter had just had a baby, and he wondered what hospital our son was born in.
"He was born at home," I answered.
The man looked at me and then said,
"Wow, you don't get out much, do you?"
Hillary Clinton goes to a gifted-student primary school in New York to talk about
The world. After her talk she offers question time.
One little boy puts up his hand. Hillary asks him what his name is. “Kenneth,” he says
And what is your question, Kenneth?” she asks.
I have three questions,” he says.
“1st - whatever happened in Benghazi?
2nd - why would you run for president if you are not capable of handling two e-mail accounts?
And, 3rd - whatever happened to the missing six-billion-dollars while you were Secretary
Of State?”
Just then the веll rings for recess. Hillary informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess.
When they resume Hillary says, “Okay, where were we? Oh, that’s right, question time. Who has a
Question?”
A different boy - little Johnny - puts his hand up.
Hillary points to him and asks him what his name is. “Johnny,” he says.
“And what is your question, Johnny?” she asks.
“I have five questions,” he says.
“1st - whatever happened in Benghazi?
2nd - why would you run for president if you are not capable of handling two e-mail accounts?
3rd - whatever happened to the missing six-billion dollars while you were Secretary of State?
4th - why did the recess веll go off 20 minutes early?”
And 5th - where’s Kenneth?”…
H e’s the only son of Awh Schitt and Oh Schitt. Awh Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married Oh Schitt, the owner of the Kneedeep Schitt Inn.
Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. They produced six children. Holy Schitt, their first, passed on shortly after birth.
Next came twin sons, Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt, two daughters, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, and another son, Bull Schitt. Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
Dip Schitt married Lotta Schitt, and they have a son, Chicken Schitt.
Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt Married the Happens brothers.
The Schitt-Happens children are Dog Schitt, Byrd Schitt and Horace Schitt.
Bull Schitt just married a spicey number, Pisa Schitt, and they are awaiting the arrival of Baby Schitt.
Now you know… Jack Schitt
I really have no use for the FBI, the CIA, the FCC, the FDA and all those three letter government agencies that intrude on our lives claiming they will make things better. Usually it’s the other way around.
Most of all I feel contempt for the EPA, the “Environmental Protection Agency” that decreed toilet manufacturers redesign their water systems to flush on 1.6 gallons of water or less… Half the water means сrар (figuratively) if it means twice the flush… which it does… and three flushes if someone drops a big enough deuce.
But the kids of today are missing out on one of life’s boyhood pleasures that we rarely told anyone about because of the punishment that would follow: The Swirlie.
The target or mark was usually a crybaby kid in first or second grade. By advance planning, three, four, five of us in 5th and 6th grade would lure him to the boy’s bathroom, tip him upside down and dunk him in a flushing toilet. It was almost worth getting caught as the little kid begged and shrieked as his hair went ’round and ’round in the water, swirling in the bowl as we laughed our аssеs off.
Alas, a childhood rite of passage no longer exists thanks to the “guvvamint” and their green rules.
I fondly remember little Dudley, squirming, shrieking, blubbering and all that soaking wet hair… Priceless!!!
(And it was only a 3 day suspension.)