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Вицове за кафето English Witze über Kaffee Chistes sobre el café Анекдоты про кофе Blagues sur le café Barzellette sul caffè Αστεία για τον καφέ Вицови за кафето Kahve Fıkraları Анекдоти про каву Piadas sobre café Dowcipy o kawie Skämt om kaffe Grapjes over koffie Vittigheder om kaffe Vitser om kaffe Vitsit kahvista Viccek a kávéról Glume despre cafea Vtipy o kávě Anekdotai apie kavą Joki par kafiju Vicevi o kavi
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Coffee Jokes

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What do you call the first level of a coffee factory?
The ground floor.
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A tall blonde walks into Starbucks. The barista says, “Hey, we have a drink named after you!”
The blonde says, “You have a drink named Tiffani?”
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Why shouldn’t you discuss coffee in polite company?
It can make for a strong and heated debate.
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I just got myself a top of the range coffee maker.
It has a lot of perks.
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A guy walks into a cafe and orders a coffee to go.
The coffee gets up and leaves.
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What currency can we use to buy coffee in space?
S T A R B U C K S.
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Did you hear about the guy who put little G.I. Joe soldiers at the bottom of his coffee cup?
He’d heard that the best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup!
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“Hey barista, how much for a cup of coffee?” says a customer.
“Two dollars,” replies the barista, “and refills are free.” “Great. Then I’ll have a refill,” answers the customer.
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People ask me if I wake up grumpy in the morning
No, I say. I just bring him some coffee.
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Why do I not like hot drinks?
It’s just not my cup of tea.
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I tried brewing my coffee with Red Bull instead of water.
I drank it and left my house to go to work. After 15 minutes I realized I forgot my car.
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Why can Starbucks get away with charging outrageous prices for coffee?
Because they have Italian titles for everything!
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"Mom's recipe for iced coffee: 1. Have kids. 2. Make coffee. 3. Forget you made coffee. 4. Drink it cold."
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“Before my first cup of coffee I hate everybody. That doesn’t change after I’ve had that coffee, but it feels much better.”
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What is Korean Dracula's favorite morning beverage?
Koh-peee! (coffee)
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I'd love to take you out for coffee this week.
You spelled wine wrong.
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Колегите: „Защо пиеш кафе всеки ден? Ще умреш ли без него?“ Аз: „Не… ама вие може.“ Колегите: „Зошто пиеш кафе секој ден? Ќе умреш ли без него?“ Јас: „Не… ама вие може.“ Los colegas: “¿Por qué tomas café todos los días? ¿Se mueren sin él?” Yo: “No… pero ustedes quizás.” Коллеги: «Зачем каждый день кофе? Умрёте без него?» Я: «Нет… а вот вы Kollegen: „Warum trinkt ihr jeden Tag Kaffee? Sterbt ihr sonst?“ Ich: „Nein… aber ihr vielleicht.“ Les collègues: «Pourquoi vous buvez du café tous les jours ? Vous mourrez sans ça ?» Moi : «Non… mais vous peut-être.» Οι συνάδελφοι: «Γιατί πίνετε καφέ κάθε μέρα; Θα πεθάνετε χωρίς αυτόν;» Ε γώ: «Όχι… αλλά εσείς μπορεί.» I colleghi: «Perché bevete caffè ogni giorno? Morite senza?» Io: «No… ma voi forse sì.» Meslektaşlar: “Neden her gün kahve içiyorsunuz? Onsuz ölür müsünüz?” Ben: “Hayır… ama siz belki.” Колеги: «Чому ви п'єте каву щодня? Без неї помрете?» Я: «Ні… але ви Colegas: “Por que vocês bebem café todos os dias? Morrem sem ele?” Eu: “Não… mas vocês talvez.” Koledzy: „Dlaczego pijecie kawę codziennie? Umrzecie bez niej?” Ja: „Nie… ale wy może.” Kollegor: ”Varför dricker ni kaffe varje dag? Dör ni annars?” Jag: ”Nej… men ni kanske.” Collega's: “Waarom drinken jullie elke dag koffie? Ga je dood zonder?” Ik: “Nee… maar jullie misschien wel.” Kollegaer: ”Hvorfor drikker I kaffe hver dag? Dør I uden det?” Mig: ”Nej… men I måske.” Kollegaer: ”Hvorfor drikker dere kaffe hver dag? Dør dere ellers?” Meg: ”Nei… men dere kanskje.” Kollegat: ”Miksi juotte kahvia joka päivä? Kuolisitteko ilman?” Minä: ”En… mutta te ehkä.” Kollégák: „Miért isztok kávét minden nap? Meghaltok nélküle?” Én: „Nem… de ti talán.” Colegii: „De ce beți cafea în fiecare zi? Muriți fără ea?” Eu: „Nu… dar voi poate.” Kolegové: „Proč pijete kávu každý den? Umřete bez ní?“ Já: „Ne… ale vy možná.“ Kolegos: „Kodėl geriate kavą kasdien? Numirtumėte be jos?“ Aš: „Ne… bet jūs gal.“ Kolēģi: „Kāpēc jūs dzerat kafiju katru dienu? Bez tās nomirsiet?“ Es: „Nē… bet jūs varbūt.“ Kolege: „Zašto pijete kavu svaki dan? Umrli biste bez nje?“ Ja: „Ne… ali vi možda.“
Colleagues: “Why do you drink coffee every day? Will you die without it?”  Me: “No… but you might.”
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Тези Оние што го пијат кафето без шеќер додека се обидуваат да ти објаснат дека е одлично. Los que toman café sin azúcar mientras intentan explicarte que está buenísimo. Те Diejenigen Ceux qui boivent leur café sans sucre en essayant de t’expliquer que c’est délicieux. Αυτοί που πίνουν τον καφέ χωρίς ζάχαρη ενώ προσπαθούν να σου εξηγήσουν ότι είναι πεντανόστιμος. Quelli che bevono il caffè senza zucchero mentre cercano di spiegarti che è buonissimo. Şekersiz kahve içip sana bunun harika olduğunu anlatmaya çalışanlar. Ті Aqueles que bebem café sem açúcar enquanto tentam explicar-te que é ótimo. Ci De som dricker kaffe utan socker medan de försöker förklara för dig att det är jättegott. Degenen die koffie zonder suiker drinken terwijl ze je proberen uit te leggen dat het heerlijk is. Dem der drikker kaffe uden sukker De som drikker kaffe uten sukker mens de prøver å forklare deg at det er kjempegodt. Ne jotka juovat kahvia ilman sokeria samalla kun yrittävät selittää sinulle Azok Cei care beau cafeaua fără zahăr în timp ce încearcă să-ți explice că este delicioasă. Ti Tie Tie Oni koji piju kavu bez šećera dok ti pokušavaju objasniti da je odlična.
Those who drink coffee without sugar while trying to explain to you that it's delicious.
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