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Most popular
Two admins are talking, "This friend of mine
Shot down the main server yesterday within minutes."
"So what is he, like, a hacker?"
"No, an imbecile."
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A web designer is filling out a form:
Age: 31
Height: 5'9"
Eye color: #008000
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A programmer gets shopping instructions from his
Wife: Go buy a cauliflower. If they have oranges, get two dozens. He
Comes home with 24 cauliflowers.
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Jokes about communism are only good if everybody gets
Them.
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Stephen Hawking died.
Have you tried turning him off and on again?
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What should I put on my tofu burger?
A curse!
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Last words of a Jedi apprentice, "Of course I
Know which side the light saber comes out!"
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A superconductor comes into a bar.
"Hey!" says the barkeep, "we don't serve
Superconductors!"
The superconductor didn't put up any resistance.
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Panic, Chaos, Pandemonium – my work here is
Finished.
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Why did Thor lose his power of lightning as a
Teenager?
Because he got grounded.
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IT paradox?
The warmer a computer becomes, the more it freezes.
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It is a fact of nature that light arrives faster than
Sound. Which is why some people can appear quite bright, until they
Speak.
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Boss:
"I can clearly smell alcohol on
Somebody's breath!"
One of the staff:
"Um, boss, this is a video conference."
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Why did the surgeon not like the movie?
It was the uncut version.
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I went on a date with a chess player to an Italian restaurant with
Checkered table cloths. It took him maybe half an hour to pass the salt.
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Romantic relationships can actually be represented in
Algebra. You for example, have definitely at some point looked at your X
And asked yourself Y.
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Clever Jokes
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I'm a geek, but you know what? I'm not a nerd. And there is a difference. Allow me to explain.
A geek is the kind of person that'll stand in line to see the midnight premiere of the new Harry Potter movie. That's me, that's how I roll...
Now a nerd is the kind of person who goes to the midnight premiere of the new Harry Potter movie dressed like Harry Potter. And that sh*t is pathetic, right?
What's up with those losers?
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