Jewish Jokes

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Which US National park is most welcoming to Arabic and the Jewish people?
Yosemite.

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I was sitting at the park with a friend when a man walked by...
He had on a black hat and a black robe. His sideburns were curly and his beard was long.
My friend said "That guy is Jewish"
I thought "He looks 100% to me"

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Did you see the new Jewish movie?
I heard Israeli good.

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How did the Jewish boy do on his English test?
Hebrew it.

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What's a Jewish kid's favorite game to play in the attic?
The silent game

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Jewish jokes are unfunny
Anne frankly they are kind of offensive

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All my Jewish friends must have really liked their summer camps
... Because they haven’t come back

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Did you hear about the brand of brans that cause gase in Jewish people more then in others?
It's called Heinz Hitler

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I tried to set up a new summer school in Isreal ...
For kids with ADHD, but now I am told the name of it, Jewish Concentration Camp won’t work 🧐

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Why are Jewish funeral's so easy to plan?
Because they're already cremated

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How did the Jewish brewery owner make his drinks?
Hebrew it

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What do you call a Jewish theatre?
A cinemagogue. Sorry, I'm not sorry

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What did the Jewish Bostonian woman declare to her Sunday bridge group about her recent knitting project?
"I'm so AUtistic!"
EDIT: Ahtistic.

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What do you call a family of jewish people who grow apples
Apple Jews

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Didn't know so many Hispanic guys were Jewish
But I keep hearing them say Yahweh

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You hear about the Jewish Mother Doll?
You pull the string and it rolls it eyes and says,
"AGAIN with the string?"

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My dad's Christian and my mom's jewish and they LOVE recycling...
But it's a little awkward for both me and my grandad on ash wednesday. Sadly he didn't survive the holocaust.

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What is the top selling protein with Jewish People (May be offensive)
YahWhey

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