Old People Jokes

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A teacher asked me why my daughter's name was so weird...
She asked why I had spelled it like E. M. M. A instead of just Emma, and I said that it describes the phrase that I told people when I let them know my SO was pregnant,
"Everyone. Makes. Mistakes. Alright?"

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What do old people with Alzheimer's often say?
I don't remember.

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How do old people stay in ouch with their deceased friends?
Through social mediums.
(Read this on Facebook. Take no credit, but I don't remember who said it.)

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What do you call a bus driver who helps old people and parents with children on and off the bus?
A stand up driver.

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What technology are old people better at using than young people?
Life support.

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Did you hear about the Mexican man who went to the old people home to visit his grandpa?
See senior.

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I just got a job as a senior director in a nursing home.
I tell old people where to go.

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I was begging God to give me a hot body.
Great. Now I’m enjoying the hot flashes of menopause.

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