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Вицове за секс, 18+ English Sexwitze, Sex-Witze, 18 +, Org... Chistes y anécdotas Sexo, 18 +... Русский Blagues de Sex - +18 ans Barzellette su Sesso Σεξουαλικα ανεκδοτα Секс Türkçe Анекдоти про Секс 18+, Анекдот... Português Dowcipy i kawały: Seks 18+ Svenska Seks moppen 18+, Moppen over l... Sex jokes Sex-vitser Seksivitsit Szex viccek Româna Anekdoty a vtipy o sexu a milo... Lietuvių Anekdotes par seksu Seks, Seksi vicevi, Sex
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Sex Jokes

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At the retreat, a couple was told to individually write a sentence using the words …et les femmes tellement compliquées... Démonstration par l’exemple. Une expérience de sociologie a été réalisée dans laquelle on a demandé aux étudiants et aux étudiantes qui suivaient le cursus,... По време на семеен ритриит от една двойка е поискано да напишат поотделно изречение, използвайки думите „се-кс“ и „обич“. Жената : „Когато двама зрели хора се обичат страстно и дълбоко, и се...
At the marriage retreat, Ben and Mary are given a test. They have to write a sentence with the words ‘love’ and ‘sеx’ in it.
Mary writes:
“When two people are passionately and deeply in love and respect each other very much, it is spiritually and morally acceptable for them to engage in the act of sеx.”
Ben writes:
“I love sеx”
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Apparently men think about sеx every seven seconds.
Luckily I wrote this in sеx.
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My girlfriend dumped me last week right after I broke my wrist.
Just when I needed her the most.
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As a young boy I was concerned with the Earth, how we were damaging it with pollution. I was worried for the welfare for all the endangered species, how we were eradicating whole species with every skyscraper we built or every gas-guzzling car that was made. I feared for poor, underprivileged children in far away countries that didn’t have clean water and were dying of horrible diseases.
Then I discovered wanking.
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I think I’ve been watching too much роrn recently.
My self-winding watch is up to September 2033.
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An 80-year-old millionaire becomes engaged to a beautiful 22-year-old model. He goes to his doctor for a checkup a couple of weeks before the wedding date.
The doctor looks him over and says, “Bill, you seem completely healthy but I must tell you one thing.”
“What’s that?”, asks the millionaire.
“At your age, sеx can be dangerous, and you need to watch it, take care, it could be really deadly” the doctor replies.
Bill thinks for a minute and then says, “What the hеll, if she dies, she dies.
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Sam was looking for a little “action.” He picked up a sweet young thang at the bar and took her back to his hotel room. …
…
Little did he know she was dамn near a nymphomaniac.
After six times she was screaming for more. After the *eighth* time Sam told her that he needed to slip out for a pack of cigarettes.
On the way out he stopped in the men’s room. He stood in front of the urinаl, unzipped, and felt a moment of panic that he couldn’t find “it.”
After a couple of minutes “fishing around” he finally said, “Look, it’s OK. She’s not here!”
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I asked my wife if she enjoys a cigarette after sеx and she said,
"No, one drag is enough."
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I read with some dismay that the population of Earth is due to hit the 8 billion mark this week.
That means there are 4 billion women out there, and I still can’t find one of the вiтсhеs who’s willing to let me shаg them.
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I am a sеx machine. No, I mean that literally.
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They say men think about sеx every 7 seconds, so when I eat a hotdog I try to finish it in 6 seconds so it doesn’t get awkward.
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After making a salad for dinner tonight,
I have come to the conclusion there is no ‘straight’ way to wash a Cucumber using your hands!
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Guy goes to the dentist where he is asked if he has had оrаl sеx recently…
‘Yes! How did you know, do I have a рuве stuck in my teeth?’
‘No’, replied the dentist, ‘ you’ve got shiт on your nose’
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Gave the wife an оrgаsм last night.
Ungrateful вiтсh spat it back out.
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If a woman gave in very fast it's not because of the man but the men that came before him.
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Anant's poem on sex
I said 1,
She said come.
I said 2,
She said do.
I said 3,
She was open and free
I said 4,
Her pantees were on the floor
I said 5,
Her bush was like a bee hive
I said 6 ,
It was fixed
I said 7
She was in heaven
I said 8
We were infront of the hospital gate
I said 9
The baby was fine
I said 10
She said come again
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I took a fат bird back to my flat for sеx last night.
As soon as we got there she looked at me and said, “I really can’t do this.”
As she waddled back out of the building I thought to myself, “I wonder why she changed her mind?”
Then I saw the ‘Out Of Order’ sign on the lift.
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Indian casenova Anant arranges for a pakistani actresses to come to his room for the evening. Once in the room they undress, climb into bed, and proceeded with sсrеwing for mind blowing sеx.
When finished, the he jumps up, runs over to the window, comes back from dark and jumps back into bed with the ракi actress and commences to repeat the performance.
The actress is impressed with the gusto of the second encounter. When finished, the he jumps up, runs over to door and comes back from dark, climbs out the other side, jumps back into bed with the her and starts again.
She is amazed as this sequence is repeated four times. During the fifth encore, she was amazed
So when they are done she asks anant , dear anant how can you manage.
Man in bed says - Anant is outside- with tickets saleing to other guys in queue.
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