So a маsосhisт, a pyromaniac, a necrophile, a sаdisт, a реdорhilе, and a zоорhilе are all standing in a jail cell.
The zоорhilе says,
"You know what I could really go for right now? Sеx with a cat."
The реdорhilе says,
"Even better: Sеx with a kitten."
The sаdisт asks, "How about we beat the kitten up, and THEN have sеx with it?"
The necrophile adds, "Alright let's beat a kitten to death, and then have sеx with it."
Then the pyromaniac says,
"Okay, how about we beat a kitten to death, light it on fire, and then have sеx with it?"
After all of this the маsосhisт finally speaks up and says,
"Meow."
A farmer hires a college student one summer to help around the farm. At the end of the summer the farmer says, “Son, since you have done such a fine job here this summer, I am going to throw a party for you.”
The college guy says, “Right on, thanks a lot man.”
So the farmer says, “Well you better be able to handle a few beers because there will be lotsa drinkn’ going on.”
College guy “Hey, I can drink just as much as anyone else so I should do just fine.”
Farmer “There is also going to be a lot of fightn’ so I hope you are ready.”
College guy “I have been working hard
All summer and I think I am in pretty good shape.”
Farmer says, “Well, did I mention that there will be lotsa sеx?”
College guy “Good. I have been out here all summer and I have been dying for some action. What should I wear to this party?”
Farmer says, “I don’t care it’s just going to be me and you.”