Doctor's jokes, Health Jokes, Medical joke
A guy and a girl meet at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl’s place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands.
He then takes off his pants and washes his hands.
The girl watches him and says, “You must be a dentist”
The guy, surprised, says “Yes…how did you figure that out?”
The girl says, “Easy… you keep washing your hands."
One thing led to another and they make love.
After they were done, the girl says, “You must be a great dentist.”
The guy, now with a boosted ego says, “Yes, I sure am a great dentist. How did you figure that out?”
The girl says, “Easy… I didn’t feel a thing!”
Doc, says Steve, "I want to be castrated."
"What on Earth for?"
"It's something I've been thinking about for a long time.
If you don't do it, I'll just go to another doctor."
"OK, but it's against my better judgment."
Steve has his operation.
The next day he walks down the hospital corridor very slowly, legs apart, with his drip stand.
Heading toward him is another patient walking exactly the same way.
"Hi there," says Steve, "It looks as if you've just had the same operation as me."
"Yeah," says the patient, "I finally decided I'd like to be circumcised."
Steve's eyes widen in horror, "Oh no! That's the word!"
"Doctor, I have a problem..."
"What’s your problem?"
"I рее in my sleep, every night!"
"Why?"
"Oh, well... Every night, a little devil visits me in my sleep and asks me; “Did we рее today?”.
"And, that’s it? The solution is so simple.. Listen to me! If the little devil comes again you’re gonna answer; 'Yeah, dude, I did!'"
"And that will cut it off?"
"Sure! Like a knife!"
At night, the little devil showed up on the patient’s dream and whispered;
"Did we рее today?"
"Yeah, dude, I did!" said angry the guy.
And little devil replied: "What about роор?"
Little Johnny's next door neighbor had a baby. Unfortunately, the little baby was born with no ears. When they arrived home from the hospital, the parents invited Little Johnny's family to come over and see their new baby.
Little Johnny's parents were very afraid their son would have a wise сrаск to say about the baby. So, Little Johnny's dad had a long talk with Little Johnny before going to the neighbors.
He said, "Now, son...that poor baby was born without any ears. I want you to be on your best behavior and not say one word about his ears, or I'm really going to spank you when we get back home.
"I promise not to mention his ears at all," said Little Johnny.
At the neighbor's home, Little Johnny leaned over the crib and touched the baby's hand. He looked at its mother and said, "Oh, what a beautiful little baby!"
The mother said, "Thank you very much, Little Johnny."
He then said, "This baby has perfect little hands and perfect little feet. Why... just look at his pretty little eyes! Did his doctor say he can see good?"
The Mother said, "Why, yes... his doctor said he has 20/20 vision."
Little Johnny said, "Well, it's a dамn good thing, cause he sure as hеll can't wear glasses!"