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Newest jokes
Duck jokes
Duck jokes
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Newest jokes
Most popular
Which mouse can walk with two legs? Mickey Mouse. But which duck can walk with two legs?
All of them dumbass
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A duck walks in to an alternative medicine practicioners office. Points a wing at him and says with a frown:
"Quack!"
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What's the difference between Turkey and Duck?
Duck doesn't deny the Armenian Genocide.
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Little joke I thought of: What do you call a duck being kidnapped?
An abduction.
I'll quietly leave through this conveniently placed door.
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The secret service used to yell "Get Down" whenever the president was in immediate danger
Now they yell "Donald Duck!"
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What happens when you call a duck?
His phone wings
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The bodyguards of the POTUS used to shout "Get down, Mr. president!" during assassination attempts
Now they just say "Donald, duck"
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A duck was about to cross the road when a chicken said..
"Dont do it man, you will never hear the end of it"
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How did the duck rob the bank?
It quacked the code to the vault.
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There are 2 ducks. One duck pulls his pants down. What does the other duck see?
His but-quack.
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If someone tries to assassinate Trump what will the secret service shout?
"Donald, duck"
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Did you know the Secret Service is no longer allowed to say "GET DOWN!" when the President is getting attacked?
Now they're required to say "Donald, duck!"
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Having a duck оrgy at my house...
If anyone wants to come on down.
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What would happen if Donald Trump was about to be assassinated?
Secret Service would shout "Donald, Duck!"
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What did the duck say to the cheese grader.
Nothing ducks can't talk
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What will the secret service yell when something is hurtling towards the president?
Donald duck!
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I ordered giant duck at a fancy restaurant last night
The bill was huge!
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I was walking passed a farm and a sign said ‘Duck, eggs’.
I thought, that’s an unnecessary comma. And then it hit me.
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