Golf jokes

Add a joke Newest jokes Most popular

Why do old people like golf?
Just like in their life, the goal is to get the least amount of strokes before you go in the hole

0

0

Husband has 6 months to live
Asks his wife, "Will you marry again?"
She says she supposes so, eventually.
"Will he sleep in our bed"?
She says of course he will.
"Will you let him use my golf clubs?"
"No, he couldn't use them. He's left handed."

0

0

They always asked me if I play basketball because I was tall.
They stopped asking me that when I asked them if they play mini golf.

0

0

Why do Catholic priests like golf?
Because most of the holes are under 18.

0

0

Why do married men love golf so much?
Because it's not the same three holes over and over again.

0

0

There is only one sport in which I can get a high score.
It's golf.

0

0

Why couldn't the computer play golf?...
... Because it had the wrong Driver

0

0

A couple walk Into the clubhouse after a round of golf.
The pro asks "how was you round?" The husband says "it was good but my wife got stung by a bee".
"Where did she get stung?"
"Between the first and second hole". The pro says "well her stance was too wide."

0

0

A lady runs up to a golf pro giving a lesson ...
... and says "Help! I've just been stung by a bee!". The golf pro asks where. The lady says "Between the first and second holes." The pro says,
"Well, I can tell you right now your stance is way too wide."

0

0

I got in to a gun fight with a mexican at a golf club.
I shot a hole in Juan.

0

0

What do you Get when you Swallow a Golf ball?
A Colon 1.

0

0

Why do middle age men like golf
They're good at finishing in few strokes

0

0

What STD Does Tiger Woods have?
Golf clap

0

0

If you're a tall person and someone asks you if you play basketball
Ask them if they play mini golf

0

0

Leggs pantyhose and the Richard Pryor estate are hosting a golf tournament.
It's called the Pryor Leggs Open.

0

0

You got gonnorhea from Tiger Woods?
*Golf clap.*

0

0

I was playing golf paired with a chimney sweep the other day. I said to him "Whats your handicap?"
He replied "Central Heating"

0

0

My ex GF was like a good game of golf.
All holes subpar.

0

0