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A guy is on a date with a girl, so he takes her to Lovers' Lane.
When they get up there, she says, ''I have to be honest with you - I'm a hоокеr.'' The guy thinks about this for a short time and says it's okay. He agrees to pay her $25, and they start having sеx.
After they finish, the guy says, ''I have to be honest with you now. I'm a cab driver, and it'll cost you $25 for me to drive you back into town.''
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Q: Why can't psychics have children?
A: Their husbands have crystal ваlls.
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A blonde is putting together a puzzle. She is very frustrated and asks her husband for help.
"It's supposed to be a tiger!" she cries.
"Honey," says her husband wearily, "Put the Frosted Flakes back in the box."
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Dirty Raggedy Ann Schneewittchen trifft Pinocchio Πινόκιο Τι λέει η χιονάτη στο πινόκιο ενώ κάθεται στην μύτη του; Срещнала Марийка Понокио и започнала да го моли: На някои девойки им харесваше ¿Qué le dice Caperucita Roja a Pinocho mientras están haciendo un 69?. - Зошто Снежана била избркана од Дизни? Q: What did Snow White say to Pinocchio when she was sitting on his face? A: "Lie to me! Lie to me!" Idzie Czerwony Kapturek przez las i widzi Pinokia. Łapie go za szmaty Snövit har fått sparken från Disney - Varför fick Snövit sparken från Disney? - Dom hittade henne över Pinocchios näsa Rotkäppchen hüpft durch den Wald und ist total geil.Da sieht sie Pinoccio durch den Wald gehen. Plötzlich stürmt sie auf ihn los - Бреши! - Кричала Мальвіна Blanche Neige a été virée de Disneyland... Motif invoqué par la Direction :  'S'est mise assise sur le nez de Pinocchio et lui a demandé de dire des mensonges' Некоторым девочкам нравилось Деяким дівчатам подобалося La fata turchina sta facendo il bagno nella vasca. – Pinocchio portami una saponetta ! – grida non trovandola. Pinocchio scivola e cade nella vasca con la faccia davanti alla figa della fata. La... Geht Rotkäppchen dir den Wald und ist so richtig geil. Trifft sie Ponocchio Biancaneve è stata cacciata dal regno delle favole...è stata pizzicata davanti al naso di pinocchio..nuda...dicendo: "nega bastardo nega!!!"
Q: What did Raggedy Ann do when she was hоrny?
A: She sat on Pinocchio's nose and said, “Tell the truth tell a lie tell the truth tell a lie tell the truth tell a lie tell the truth tell a lie!!!”
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A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every day. "What is it, dear?" she asked.
He responded, "I think you bring me bad luck."
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Q: What do you call a redneck with a pig under one arm and a sheep under the other?
A: Вisеxuаl.
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A redneck calls into a radio advice show and asks, ''If I get divorced from my wife, does that mean she ain't my sister any more?
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A redneck takes his daughter to the doctor to get birth control pills.
The doctor wonders if she's a little young for birth control pills and asks her father if she's sexually active. The father replies, “No, she just kinda lays there, just like her mother.”
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Q: What do the female reindeer do when Santa takes the male reindeer out on Christmas Eve?
A: They go to town and вlоw a couple of bucks.
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There was a blonde, two brunettes, and redhead in a 400 meter relay.
The starter said, “On your mark, get set, go.” The blonde ran all the way around and said, “It was a 400 meter race, wasn't it?”
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Did you hear about the redneck who went to the hospital to have a mole removed from his d*ck?
He swore off sеx with them creatures forever.
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A man decided to spend the night with a рrоsтiтuте.
When it was over she told him to pay $500. He said he'd send it to her in an envelope marked ''Rent for Apartment.'' The next day, however, he regretted that he spent the night with her and sent only $250. When she wrote him a letter asking why he didn't pay full price, he wrote her a memo saying:
1. I thought the apartment had not been used before.
2. It did not have adequate heating.
3. It was too large to properly furnish.
A few days later the рrоsтiтuте sent him another letter saying:
1. You should have known the apartment had been rented previously.
2. The apartment did have adequate heating. You just didn't know how to turn it on.
3. The apartment was the perfect size. You just didn't have large enough furniture to fill it.
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Three boys were sitting on some steps watching cars go by.
They see a Cadillac Escalade drive by and the first boy says, "I wish i could have that Cadillac. The second boy says, "I wish I could have that Lincoln Navigator behind it. The third boy says, "i wish my whole body was covered in curly hair because my sister has a small patch between her legs and that is how she got both of those cars.
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While undressing for bed one night Alors que Bill se déshabillait pour aller au lit Rød ring En mand går til lægen og siger: "Doktor
A man goes to his doctor and says, "Please help me! I've got a problem."
The doctor examines the man and finds a red ring around his реnis. The doctor gives him an ointment to rub on the problem area.
"It's all cleared up," the man reports when he returns. "What was that medication you gave me?"
"Lipstick remover."
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One day two kids were wandering around near a stream.
One of the boys wandered off near a bush and the other wandered farther down stream. The boy who was wandering down stream started to get lonely, so he went to find his other friend. When he got to the bush were his friend was he saw a nакеd woman and ran away. The boy that was here for a long time got curios and ran after him and asked, "Why did you run away."
The other boy said, "My mom said that if I were to ever see a nакеd woman I would turn to stone. Then I felt something get very hard so I ran."
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Q: Why did the blind blonde cross the road?
A: She was following her seeing-eye chicken.
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Разхожда се един селянин из пазара и гледа един човечец видимо недоспал стои и продава за 1 лев един едър и хубав петел.
A farmer buys a rooster to service his 200 hens. When he gets the rooster into the barnyard, he tells him, "Rаndy, I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of money. Have fun, but take your time."
The farmer points him toward the henhouse and the rooster takes off like a shot.
WHAM! Rаndy nails every hen in the henhouse, three or four times. Rаndy runs out and sees a flock of geese down by the lake. WHAM! He nails all the geese. Rаndy runs to the pigpen, the соw pasture - soon, he's been on every animal on the farm.
The farmer is distraught, worried that his expensive rooster won't even last the day.
Sure enough, the farmer wakes up the next morning to find Rаndy laid out flat in the middle of the yard, buzzards circling overhead.
The sad farmer shakes his head and says, "Oh, Rаndy, I told you to pace yourself."
Randy opens one eye, winks, and nods towards the sky, "Shhh, they're getting closer."
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Two teenagers walk through a park and see two rabbits getting it on, fast and furious.
"What are they doing?" asks the girl.
"They're jumping rope," says the boy. "Maybe I'll teach you how someday."
"I want you to teach me now," says the girl. So the two go behind some bushes and start getting it on. When the boy has his pants down, the girl asks, "What's behind your 'rope?'"
"That's my knot," says the boy.
"Well," says the girl, "untie the knot and give me some more rope."
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