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Gourmet Воотy Call... Whisk:
You won't believe what I can do with a whisk!
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Clown Воотy Call... Wig:
I wear a wig down there, too. Honk Honk!
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Yoga Instructor Воотy Call... Free:
Free yourself from your mind... as well as your pants.
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Zombie Воотy Call... Astrology:
What's your sign? I hope it's "I do it with zombies!"
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Zombie Воотy Call... Eyes:
I only have eyes for you. Glowing grey, milky, dead eyes.
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Zombie Воотy Call... Give:
I'd like to give you my heart... or my arm... or my leg...
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Zombie Воотy Call... Sign:
Hey, what's your sign? Mine's "Rest in Peace."
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Q: What's an Australian kiss?
A: It's a French kiss down under.
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Why do they call camels 'ships of the desert'?
Because they are full of Arab sемеn.
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An American cowboy was traveling in England and decided to stop at a tea shop for a drink. On the menu there were several different teas to choose from. When the waitress came to take his order, the cowboy asked, "Ma'am, what the hеll do all these names mean?"
The waitress calmly replied, "We have basically three types of tea, sir. The peacove tea is 90% substance and 10% aroma, the orange tea is 10% substance and 90% aroma, and the Blackberry tea is an acquired taste."
The cowboy responded, "Where I come from, we have three types of tea too, Ma'am. There's s-h-i-T which is 90% substance and 10% aroma, there is f-a-r-T which is 10% substance and 90% aroma, and then there is c-u-n-T which is an acquired taste."
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Q: Why doesn't Santa have any children?
A: He only comes once a year - and when he does, it's down a chimney.
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Don't Question Your Doctor Untersuchung beim Urologen Doktorn: Du måste sluta onanera. Jag: Va? Du kan inte mena allvar! Varför? Doktorn: För att det här är ett väntrum Mikko meni taannoin lääkärille ja vastaanotolla lääkäri totesi: - Se on kulkaas nyt aika lopettaa masturbointi. - Miksi niin? Kysäisi Mikko. - Aion tutkia teidät nyt Kävin lääkärissä valittamassa outoa alavatsakipua. Lääkäri käski minua lopettamaan masturbointi. ”Ai Der Arzt zum Patienten: „Sie müssen dringend aufhören zu onanieren.“ Patient: „Wieso?“ Arzt: „Ich kann Sie so nicht untersuchen!“ Młoda i atrakcyjna lekarz geriatra bada sędziwego dziadka. Po kilku chwilach badania orzeka: - Musi pan przestać się onanizować. - Dlaczego?! - Bo probuję pana przebadać... Urologen säger till patienten: – Du måste sluta att onanera så häftigt. – Varför då? – Annars kan jag inte undersöka dig. En mand kommer ind til lægen. Lægen siger: “Du er nødt til at holde op med at onanere” Manden: “Hvorfor” Lægen: “Fordi ellers kan jeg ikke undersøge dig” Arzt: Sie müssen dringend mit dem Mastubieren aufhören Patient: Warum? Arzt: Ich kann sie sonst nicht untersuchen Kvinnen var hos gynekologen da gynekologen påpeker at hun må slutte å leke så mye med underlivet sitt. - Hvorfor det En kille är hos doktorn My doctor is a very attractive woman; gorgeous face Po badaniu okulista mówi do pacjenta: - Koniecznie powinien Pan ograniczyć onanizowanie się... - Jaki ma to wpływ na wzrok? - Na wzrok żaden Доктор към пациент: - Трябва да спрете да мастурбирате? - Защо Ein Mann beim Urologen. Der Urologe: „Sie müssen unbedingt mit dem Onanieren aufhören!“ Der Mann: „Warum denn das?“ Der Urologe: „Weil ich Sie sonst nicht untersuchen kann!“ A man goes to the doctor for his annual check-up A man is at the optometrist getting his eyes checked. Вчера ходих при джипи-то. - Госпожо Старик пришел на прием к окулисту. доктор говорит пациенту: - вам нужно прекратить мастурбировать. -... Arzt: „Sie müssen sofort aufhören zu onanieren!“ Patient: „Wieso das denn?“ Arzt: „Weil ich Sie sonst nicht untersuchen kann!“ Ārsts pacientam: "Jums jāpārtarauc masturbēt". - "Kāpēc Két barát beszélget: - Voltam orvosnál. - És
A guy goes to the eye doctor. In the middle of the exam, the doctor tells him, "You need to stop маsтurватing."
The guy replies, "Why Doc? Am I going blind?"
The doctor says, "No, but you're upsetting my nurse and me."
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Geek Воотy Call... Math:
How about we add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs and multiply?
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Q: What has 40 teeth and holds back a monster?
A: My zipper.
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Q: What's the difference between light and hard?
A: You can go to sleep with the light on.
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Q: How do you make five pounds of fат look good to a man?
A: Put a niррlе on it.
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Q: What do you call a one-man quickie?
A: A yankee.
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Q: Why did the pervert cross the road?
A: His d**k was stuck in the chicken.
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