An American, a Cuban, a Russian, and a lawyer are sitting on a subway train, in the same seat. The Cuban pulls out a Cuban cigar for each person, and hands it out. The Cuban takes one рuff of his cigar, and he throws it out the window. Everybody but the Cuban goes mad. ¨You just wasted an expensive Cuban cigar! How could you?¨ The Cuban simply says, ¨See, in Cuba, cigars are very cheap.¨ The other passengers are reassured and respond with, ¨Oh, OK.¨
The Russian takes out a small bottle of Russian vоdка and pours a shot for all the passengers. The Russian downs his shot, and throws the vоdка bottle out the window. The rest of the passengers are alarmed, once again. ¨You just destroyed an expensive bottle of Russian vоdка! How could you?¨ The Russian simply states, ¨See, in Russia, vоdка is very cheap.¨ Yet again, the other passengers are reassured and respond with, ¨Ah, yes! Of course.¨
The American scratches his head and goes, ¨I think I see the pattern here.¨ So he takes the lawyer, and he throws him out the window!¨
A lawyer named Harry had a wife and 12 children. His rental agreement was terminated by his landlord, who wanted to reoccupy the home, and so the family of fourteen needed to find a new home immediately.
But Harry was having a lot of difficulty. Whenever Harry mentioned his dozen children, nobody would lease him their house because the homeowners feared the children would wreck the place.
Harry couldn't say he had no children, because he wouldn't lie and we all know lawyers cannot and do not lie.
So one afternoon, Harry sent his wife for a walk to the cemetery with 11 of their children. He took the remaining kid with him to his appointment with a real estate agent for a showing of rental homes.
Harry loved one of the homes and the price was right. The agent asked, "How many children do you have?”
"Twelve," Harry said.
The agent asked, "Where are the others?"
The lawyer, with his best sad look, answered: “They're in the cemetery with their mother.”
Harry got the house.