A man walks into a whоrеhоusе looking for a little action and he goes up to the house owner and asks,Hey, can I get a piece from one of your fine ladies you've got here?
Sorry sir, the owner responds, but, we're all full. Aw, please I really need some рооn tang! And the owner awnswers, Well, there is one girl left but when you go meet her you have to wear this black соndом. Whatever, the man answers quickly and races upstairs. A few hours later the man comes down and says ''Wow, that was great. She didn't even make any noise. But why did I have to wear the black соndом? And the owner answers, Respect for the dead.
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?" God asks her.
"Lord," she says, "I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but I'm just not happy."
"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above."Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of apples," she says.
"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you," the good Lord tells her.
"What's a 'man', Lord?" she inquires.
"This man will be a flawed creature, with aggressive tendencies, an enormous ego and an inability to empathize or listen to you properly. All in all, he'll give you a hard time. But, he'll be вiggеr and faster and more muscular than you. He'll be really good at fighting and kicking a ball about and hunting fleet-footed ruminants, and not altogether bad in the sack."
"Sounds great," says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow. "Yeah, well. He's better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick. But, you can have him on one condition."
"What's that, Lord?" she asks. "You'll have to let him believe that I made him first."