There was a boy who couldn't say words properly, but his mum still trusted the boy to go shopping.
"Son i need you to buy us a bun, a bucket and a cocker spaniel"
The boy said "ok be right back"
So the boy went to the bakery store and he went to the man in the front and asked "sir do you have a вuм?" the man said " you mean a bun?"
And the boy said "yes a вuм." so he bought it and moved on to the next store, he asked the man working there, "sir can i have a f*cket?" and the man said "ohh~~ do you mean a 'bucket'?" and so the boy doesn't bother and says "yes, a f*cket..."
He goes to the pet store and asks "Do you have a соск and spankit?", the owner said,
"Excuse me? do you mean a cocker spaniel" the boy just says "yes a соск and spankit..." so recieved all of the items that his mum told him to buy.
He moves onto the bus stop waiting for the bus, a woman was next to him smiling to him nicely, finally the bus came, he entered the bus and noticed he was missing an item, he was missing the cocker spaniel, it was still at the bus stop, so he says to the woman "excuse me, Can you hold onto my вuм and f*cket, while i get my соск and spankit...."
A blonde cop stops a blonde motorist and asks for her driver’s license.
The motorist digs around in her purse but can’t find it. She says to the cop, “I must have left it at home, officer.”
The cop says, “Well, do you have any kind of identification?”
The motorist searches her purse again and finds a pocket mirror. She looks at it and says to the cop, “All I have is this picture of myself.”
The cop says, “Let me see.” So the blonde motorist gives the mirror to the blonde cop, who looks at it, and replies, “O Fсuк!!!, if I’d known you were a police officer, I wouldn’t have pulled you over.”