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  2. Beauty Jokes

Beauty Jokes

Add a joke Newest jokes Most popular
I know milk does a body good, but dамn girl, how much have you been drinking?
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Makeup tip: You're not in the circus.
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A beautiful woman delights a man's eye, an ugly - woman's eye.
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Your name must be Coca Cola, because you're so-da-licious
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And in her smile I see something more beautiful than the stars.
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I've seen a lot of great photos of babies in my life, so if you want my like on Facebook you better bring it.
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Does your skin feel burnt? Because I think you must have just fallen down from heaven, and re-entry gave you a tan.
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You must be an angel, because your texture mapping is so divine!
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The best part about working in an office is that if you ever forget that you got a haircut, someone will definitely point it out to you.
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What is the difference between a nicely dressed man on a tricycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tire.
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During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the priest with an unusual offer:
"Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows.
When you get to the part where I'm supposed to promise to 'love, honor and obey' and 'be faithful to her forever,' I'd appreciate it if you'd just leave that out."
He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied.
On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the groom's vows, the priest looked the young man in the eye and said:
"Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?"
The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes, I do" then leaned toward the priest and hissed:
"I thought we had a deal."
The priest put a $100 bill into the groom's hand and whispered:
"She made me a better offer."
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My dream woman has a special combination of inner and outer beauty and is, most importantly, too naive to know she's way out of my league.
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There are smart men, handsome men, rich men, sеxy men and sweet men and then there is the combination of all. We call that one a "unicorn"
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I need some band-aids I'm getting cut from all this working out.
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You take away the looks, money, intelligence, charm and success and, really, there's no real difference between me and George Clooney.
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Darling, you are the most beautiful woman in this party! Did you invite these guests on purpose?
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Mattel has a campaign urging girls to pursue their limitless potential. It's called You Can Be Anything Except A Woman With Barbie's Body.
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When you want to marry a beautiful, a smart and a rich woman - marry three times.
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