If a woman is upset, hold her and tell her how beautiful she is.

If she starts to growl, retreat to a safe distance and throw chocolate at her.

A group of tourists visit the Niagara Falls and are accompanied by a guide.

The guide says:
- I welcome you all to the Niagara Falls. These are the world's largest waterfalls and the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high that the sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing by can't be heard!"
- Now, may I request that the ladies in the back keep quiet so that we can hear the falls!

Don't follow girls.

Follow your goals and girls will follow you.

If a woman says 'do what you want',

DO NOT DO WHAT YOU WANT!
Stand still, do not blink, do not answer, don't even breathe, just play dead!

Did you know?

Woman's day was supposed to be on 6th March, but they took long to get ready. So it's celebrated on 8th March

My girlfriend is sooo smart!

I called her from my friend's phone and she said
"What's up honey?"
She already knew i am on the other side

Behind every successful man there is a woman.

Because women don't run behind unsuccessful men

The most Dangerous animal in the world is

a Smiling Woman sitting in silence

Мom, for some time i've had a relationship with our neighbour

- Bob, he could be your father...
- But, mom, age is only a number.
- Oh dear, that is not what i meant ..