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Вицове за USA English Amerikaner-Witze, Amerika Witz... Español Анекдоты про США Français Barzellette su Americani, Barz... Ελληνικά Амерички Türkçe Анекдоты про США Português Polski Svenska Nederlands Dansk Norsk Amerikkalaisvitsit, Amerikkala... Amerika viccek Româna Čeština Lietuvių Latviešu Hrvatski
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USA

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A man walks up to a cashier in a grocery store. He says,
"Hey, how much for these jalapeño peppers?" He pronounces it "jo-la-pen-o", not "hо-lo-peen-yo".
The cashier says,
"Sir, that's not what those peppers are called."
The man replies,
"Listen, buddy, this is America, and I can pronounce any word the way I please." The cashier responds, "That is as may be, sir, but those are green peppers."
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What’s the difference between the USA and a bird? ….
On a bird, the left wing and right wing work together for the benefit of the whole bird.
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Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?
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Earth without "art" is just "eh". And The United States of America without "heunedtatesam" is just "Тiтs of Erica".
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In America its called the big ваng theory, in england they call it Jeremy Kyle.
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Only on America do we accept weather predictions from a rodent but deny climate change evidence from scientists.
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Teacher: Class, who can go to the board and show us the map of the North America?
George: Yes, ma'am.
Teacher: Okay George.
George: Here is the map of North America.
Teacher: Class, who discovered North America?
Class: George!
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Only in America do we chain $2.00 ink pens to the counter but leave our $58,000 cars out in the driveway.
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Trust America to name a State after a bucket of fried chicken.
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Teacher, "Martha, come to the blackboard and tell us on the world map where America is."
Martha point to America correctly.
Teacher, "Good. Now John, you tell us who discovered America"
John, "Martha just did"
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I love magicians. Who’s that guy in America who made those landmarks disappear? Oh right, yeah, Bin Laden.
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If you think things are bad in America now……..
Just wait till Trump watches The Purge.
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Don’t worry America.
Kanye West 2020 will fix everything.
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Anyone really that surprised that USA’s first gold medal at the Rio Olympics involves shooting a gun?
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Nancy Pelosi - “I’ve decided to make a dessert, It’s called a USA downside up cake. I have to bake it before I read the recipe.”
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Donald Trump is starting a petition to stop the sale of pre-shredded cheese.
He’s very serious about trying to make the USA grate again.
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This Clown Craze has gone too far.
I mean think about it
Donald Trump President of America
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Typical good start to the Ryder Cup from America -
Arnold Palmer, one under
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