Aviation jokes, Flying jokes, Pilot jokes, Airplane jokes
A plane is on its final approach into an airport. The pilot comes on over the intercom. "This is Captain Martin. We're now on our final descent. I want to thank you for flying with us today, and I hope you enjoy your stay."
He forgets to switch off the intercom. The whole plane can now hear the conversation from the cockpit. The co-pilot says to the pilot, "Well, what are you doing today?"
Now all ears in the plane are listening in to this conversation. "Well," says the captain, "first I'm going to check into the hotel and brush my teeth. Then I'm going to ask the new stewardess out for dinner."
Everyone in the plane is trying to get a look at the new stewardess. She's so embarrassed that she runs from the back of the plane to try and get to the cockpit to turn the intercom off. Halfway down the aisle, an elderly lady grabs her by the arm to stop her, leans over and says,
"No need to run, dear, he's gotta brush his teeth first."
Being airborne approximately thirty minutes on an outbound evening Air
Lingus flight from Dublin, the lead flight attendant nervously made the
Following painful announcement in her lovely Irish brogue:
"Ladies and gentlemen, I'm so very sorry, but it appears that there has
Been a terrible mix-up... one minute prior to take-off, by our catering
Service..., I don't know how this has happened, but we have 103 passengers
On board, and..., unfortunately, we received only 40 dinner meals... I
Truly apologize for this mistake and inconvenience.”
When passengers' muttering had died down, she continued..., "Anyone who is
Kind enough to give up their meal so that someone else can eat, will
Receive free, unlimited drinks for the duration of our 4 hour flight.”
Her next announcement came about 2 hours later... "If anyone would like to
Change their minds, we still have 40 dinners available."