Jokes

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New funny categories:
Perspective jokes
And
Cat jokes

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If you cannot find your dog, open the fridge door.
He’s standing right behind you.

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What’s the one thing snipers can’t tell their wives?
I missed you this morning.

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New categories:
Jokes to Tell
|
Dry Jokes

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Where do skeletons spend their vacation?
At the Dead Sea.

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I ordered an extension course, “How to Deal With Life’s Disappointments”.
Yesterday, I got the first lesson by post.
It was an empty envelope.

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Do you ever feel like the fifth wheel?
Think about it – wouldn’t that be the steering wheel?

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A homeless guy found a laptop somebody forgot on the train.
He immediately went and checked out what’s in the Trash bin

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The phrase “We can still be friends” is like saying “Yeah, the dog died – but you can have it stuffed!

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A doctor asks his patient angrily, “Why did you send my bill back, unopened, Mr. Gunrick?”
Mr Gunrick explains, “But doctor, it was you who told me I must avoid any upsets and stress!”

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Hi, we're Michael and Kate. We'll be your joke tellers today.

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You might be a redneck if your house has more wheels then your car.

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I was going to tell a Mexican joke, but that's just crossing the border!

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Have you heard about that new coffee that makes you tired and unhappy. Its called depresso.

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The Japanese flag is actually just a pie chart about how many of them are scared of Godzilla.

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What do you get if you cross a left leg with a right leg?
A squashed ball.

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Wanna see an idiот in plastic?
Take a look at your driver's license.

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Why is there a ‘d’ in the word fridge but not in the word refrigerator?

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