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One day, in the Serengeti, a zebra started wondering if he was a white horse with black stripes, or a black horse with white stripes. So he goes around asking all the animals. He never gets his answer. One fateful day, he dies and goes to Heaven. In Heaven, the zebra gets an idea. ¨I will go ask God!¨ So, he asks God, and God chuckles. ¨You are what you are!¨ The zebra gets sad. He walks around and his dead zebra friend shows up. He asks, ¨What is wrong?¨ The zebra answers, ¨Well, I asked God if I was either a white horse with black stripes, or a black horse with white stripes. He just replied ´You are what you are!´¨ His friend says, ¨Oh! You are a white horse with black stripes! Why? Because he would have said ´You is what you is!´
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He’s not really dead, his update failed
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What do you say when trumps is still president during 2020? magic
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What noise does Steven hawkings make when he dies? Windows shutting down theme tune
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Why are babies called bundles of joys?
When you break the bundle, it gives you joy.
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Dead people jokes are the best there ground breaking.
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Suicidal people are ground breaking
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Wanna hear a dry joke? a desert
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When the chair was invented, the inventor’s friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: ‘You might want to sit down for this.’
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When your mom tries to hit you with the belt but misses and hits herself… #victoryroyale
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A hot woman called “Jessie” was showering when the phone rang…
Jessie was upset because the phone wouldn’t stop ringing, and she goes out nакеd from the bathroom to answer the phone in the hall…
Jessie on the phone: 《Hello? 》
The one on the phone: 《Oh hi i’m Jeff i just wanted to tell you don’t go out from your bathroom nакеd next time because my brother is behind you right now trying to rаре you》
Jessie: 《Stop it my sister! this is the 10th time you do this cringe joke! it gets boring!》
But sadly it wasn’t a joke and she cried alot that night and learned how not to go out nакеd from the bathroom again.
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How does Steven hawking take a shiт he logs out
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What is Нiтlеr’s least favorite month?
Jewly.
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A man walks into a bar, he gets a concussion.
After 2 months of recovering, the same man rushes head first into the bar. He goes into a coma.
After 2 years, he amazingly wakes up. He then gets in his car and drives into the bar at 70 mph. He dies. Did I mention he was suicidal?
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So Jesus has been nailed to the cross. On the first day, he starts to moan, “Peter, Peter”.
Well, Peter hears Jesus moaning and feels it is important, so begins to go up the hill. On his way, he is met by some Roman soldiers and they proceed to beat his аss back down the hill.
On the second day, Peter hears Jesus moaning again, “Peter, Peter”.
Peter thinks to himself, this is important. He heads up the hill, fights past the first line, but gets a beatdown by the second group and back down the hill he goes.
On the third day, Peter is woken up by Jesus sounding very weak, but calling out, “Peter, Peter”.
Peter feels that whatever it is that Jesus needs him for, must be very important. Peter heads up the hill, he is on a mission. He manages to fight his way thru three sets of Roman guards and make his way to the cross Jesus has been nailed to for three days. He looks up to Jesus, and says “Jesus, I have heard your calls, what is so important”?
Jesus- “Peter, I can see your house from here”.
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Here’s a joke - your life
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Ancient Greek body vs modern Greek body! Ancient Greek body vs modern Greek body!
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2000 Years ago and today
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