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So, I'm single. It's weird 'cause always knew I was gonna die broke and alone. I just didn't know I was gonna live that way, too.

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Why did sally fall of the swing
She had no arms
Knock knock
Who's there
Not sally
What did sally get for Christmas we don't know she didn't open it yet

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People think kids are the only ones that want to get out of class at 3 o'clock every single day. No, no -- go see the teachers on a Friday at 3 o'clock. You'll see teachers stiff-arming kids on the way out to the parking lot.

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I dunno... something in Japanese.

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A black man, a Mexican man, a white man, an Asian man, a priest, a rabbi, and a рrоsтiтuте walk into a bar.
It was a very popular bar.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Dedication and hard work

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Me: Guess What?
Lad: What?
*Gets ran over by a bus*

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Die hard

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Why was Sally rolling in the grass?
She was on fire.

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Healthcare in America is too expensive, ain't it? It's too expensive for the average person. What if you below average with no insurance? You might as well call Dr. Kevorkian.

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Arguing on the internet is like competing in the Special Olympics: win or lose, you're still rетаrdеd.

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Good friends don't let you do dumb things......................... Alone

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I think people should stop picking on fат kids.............
They got enough on their plates !

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Roses Are black
Violets are black
I am blind

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What do a Pakistani wife and husband have in common?
Nothing. It was an arranged marriage.

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Who is the соскsuскеr deleting all these jokes?

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When they're nine years old, they have an attention-seeking constitution that is relentless... Honestly, it makes you want to drive drunк on Halloween. Look at Superman fly!

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Republicans are red, Democrats are blue,
Neither one of them,
Gives a fuск about you!

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