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Most popular
You need to get a life outside of the internet. Go outside, look around. I'm sure trailer parks smell lovely in the morning.
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fake nails? fake hair?
fake personality?
are u sure u wernt made in china?
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Me in a room with my ex wife, Нiтlеr and Stalin and I have one gun and two bullets. Let me shoot my ex two times to be sure.
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The guy is 22, and he immediately launches into his life philosophy, which is cute when someone is 22, right? He's like, 'Here's what I think about life. Here's my big life plan.' I was like, 'You know what? I'll see you in five years when you're on anti-depressants and thinking about teaching. '
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Johnny and Dave own a meat business. they are driving down a dirt road in there meat truck and hit something big ваng!!!!! what the hеll was that said johnny. Dave said i have know idea. johnny said go have a look. Dave comes back and said we've hit a соw. johnny said is it any good. Dave said its head is crushed. johnny said well cut its head off skin it gut it and put it in the back with the rest. so they drive down the road and hit a sheep johnny said is it any good Dave said yes johnny said skin it gut it chuck it in the back with the rest. they drove down the road a little bit more ваng!!!!! what the fuск was that said johnny i don't know. go have a look said johnny. Dave came back and said we've hit a pig johnny said is it any good yeah skin it gut it chuck it in the back with the rest. dave comes back and says what do you want me to do with his motorbike
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Bully: Your jokes suск! Me: Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road
Bully: Why?
Me: To get to the Gаy Mans house
Bully: Ha The Chicken must be gаy!
Me: Knock Knock
Bully: Another Sтuрid Joke?
Bully: Alright who's there?
Me: The Chicken
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Ex: Gosh I hate you! Your soon fake. Ex boyfriend: Shut up at least my iPhone battery life is last longer than your fake relationship
Others: OHHHHHHHHH
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Teacher: Why are there rings on Saturn?
Kid: Because God liked it, so he put a ring on it.
Teacher: Saturn was not a single lady.
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Whats the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One has a moustache and smells of fish and the other is a walrus.
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A woman had 20 children. 10 girls 10 boys, all of their names were leroy. Boys spelt Leroy girls spelt Leroigh. She met a man one day and told him how many children she had and what their names were. " why did you name all of your children Leroy/Leroigh?" The man asked. "It's easy to call them all together. For example Leroy/Leroigh time for bet time for supper." The woman laughed. The man asked "how do you call them if you only need one of the children?" The woman cackled "by their last names of course!"
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How to be Insulting at Christmas: Try to find what you were given last year and give it back to the person who gave it to you.
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I sneeze and all the snot got everywhere. Someone says: You're disgusting! I say back: your internet history is disgusting. (Laughter)
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I'm tired of all these old people joining Facebook. It's not for you. All I'm saying is, I don't want to go on Facebook and be invited to be a fаn of 'The Andy Griffith Show.'
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I will never forget my first date… talk about insults! …
….
I asked her if I could give her a goodnight kiss on the cheek - she lifted her skirt and веnт over!
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Me: Why did the Pizza Delivery guy cross the rode?
Friend: To get to the other side?
Me: No to delivery pizza to the hideous girl on the other side!
Friend: ...
Me: Knock Knock!
Friend: Who's there!?
Me: The Pizza Delivery guy!
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How come "you're a peach" is a complement but "you're bananas" is an insult? Why are we allowing fruit discrimination to tear society apart?
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File This Insult away, you may need it some day soon.
Have you considered suing your brains for non-support?
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I watched the Harry Potter films for the first time at the weekend
They were okay, but a bit unrealistic: a gingеr schoolkid with two friends?
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