Insults

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Cat: ha your a вuтт sniffer dog: your a pussy

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The closest thing you will ever get to a рussy is looking at a cat

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Boy: My diск is so hard
Girl: To find

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Bully: Hey аsswiре, I bet you're still a virgin.
Asswipe: Hey diсквrаin, I bet the last time you got any action was when you were busting a shiт and your finger slipped through the toilet paper

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It's not weird to see nакеd people. We see nudе people all the time -- you know, cable and R-rated movies -- but those people in the movies have been pre-approved to be nакеd. They went through a casting director or something. Everyone gets on the nudе beach. It's not the Рlаyвоy Channel down there; it's more like the Discovery Channel.

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Women think about sеx every 7 seconds. Just not with you.

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Girl #1 - "What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved!"
Girl #2 - "oh"
Girl #1 - "Did you sea what I did there?" Girl #2 - "Nope."
Girl #1 - "I'm shore you did."
Girl #2 - *cough cough*
Girl #1 - "Cod, man! Clam down and don't be so crabby!"
Girl #2 - "........"
Girl #1 - "Jokes seem fishy?"
Girl #2 - "You're the joke."
Girl #1 - "beach"

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Bully:HA your so short
Me:atleast im вiggеr than your 1 inch dick

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Bully: hey mother f*cker
You: yeah cause I fuск your mom

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A boy is asking his dad some last questions before his dad died. The boy was asking questions his dad would never answer.
Boy: Who did you love most?
Dad: My parents, obviously.
Boy: Why do you hate Mom?
Dad: She assaulted me before you were born..
Boy: What was the biggest mistake of your life?
Dad: Adopting you. *dies*
Boy: ...

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When Santa came home, his wife, Jeeto, was crying.
"Your mother insulted me," Jeeto sobbed.
"My mother? How could she do that when she is on vacation on the other side of the country?" Santa asked.
"I know. But this morning a letter addressed to you arrived. I opened it because I was curious."
"And?"
"At the end of the letter it said, 'Dear Jeeto, when you have finished reading this letter, don't forget to give it to my son.'"

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Friend: Fail
You: sorry but were not talking about you moms abortion pill

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Guy:U r the gayest person out of all the gаys. You:Вiтсh please,I'm straighter than the pole your mom dances on at night

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*If someone types this on the internet*
Bully: I will kick your ass
You: You're behind a computer screen acting tough. That seems legit.

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Person-art sucks
Me- without art the earth would be eh

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Guy: My diск is the same size as the titanic!
Me: oh so you mean it sunk?

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Idiот: *insults me*
Me: Apart from that statement, what else did you pull out of the toilet?

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Did your parents keep the placenta and throw away the baby?

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