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  2. Insults

Insults

Add a joke Newest jokes Most popular
Dumb kid: WANNA FIGHT?!
Me: In my country don't believe in hitting little girls, sorry.
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So my mate is telling me how he traded insult for insult last night.
Seems he picked up this ditzy airhead in the pub and they went back to her apartment. She suddenly stopped their love-making.
“What’s wrong?” he asked “Did I do something wrong? Say something wrong?”
He said she just lay there, rolling her eyes and she said, “Nothing. I don’t want to talk about it.”
So he knows something is wrong and so he just talks to her for a while to settle her down, then asks her again, “Now tell me what’s wrong.”
She says, “Well, I hate to hurt your feelings, but to be perfectly honest, your оrgаn is just too small.”
My friend feels lower than a snake’s belt buckle, but he hits back hard, saying, “Well, sweetie, my оrgаn was never meant to play in a cathedral.”
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Boy can I tell you a secret
Girl sure
Boy whispers in her ear penis
Girl is that supposed be funny because you don't have one
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Wife teaching English to husband
Wife: I'm beautiful, i'm slim, i'm hot, what tense is this?
Husband: Past tense! lol
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Guy1 : your a asshole
Guy2 : at least I have a asshole
Guy1 : yah cause otherwise shiт would come out your mouth
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Twinkle twinkle little snitch, mind your own business, you nosey b*tch!
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I grew up back East, and I still have an apartment in New York, and I go back and forth between L. A. and New York. The difference between the two places -- basically this: here in L. A., I'm perceived as kind of a fast-talking, little bit of a hot-headed streetwise guy from Jersey; in New York, everyone thinks I'm gаy.
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Random Person: suск my diск!
Me: i'll get the microscope
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Ratchet Вiтсh : I would slap you but I don't want to get sluт on my hand
Me : Don't know why considering it's all over your outfit.
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Loser: *gives an insult*
Me: *sighs* I don't have the strength to come back. Your face is already wearing me out
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Insult: ОМG you can't read! Are you blind?!?!
Comeback:I'm not blind my eyes just hurt from looking at your face.
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Hater-your so dumb
Nerd-go get a life I think theres a few going cheep going at asdas smart price range
Other guy- ouch that must hurt mate
Class ooooooooohhhhhhhhhh
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Guy1.. рissеs u off
You... u know u arent good at singing, u arent good at dancing, but u are good at acting, acting like a little b*tch
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Me: You r a woman
My friend: No I'm not
Me:Tell that to your diск. Oh wait you don't have one!
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Cop:
"Do you know why I pulled you over?"
Me:
"So it wouldn't be windy when we talked."
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Idiот: Вiтсh I have more сuм than you, fаg.
Me: Cause i've been using mine on your mom.
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GUY: Comon b*tch fight me...
ME: I would, but i dont want to bring back memories of your father
Everyone else: ohhhhhhhhh holy shit
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Man - “So do you want to go out maybe?”
Woman - “Sorry, I don’t date outside my species.”
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